Aed jokes
Q: What did the DNA say to the other DNA?
A: Do these genes make my butt look fat? 💩
What is worse than a dead baby in a trash can?
100 dead babies in a trash can.
What is worse than that?
There's a live one at the bottom.
What is worse than that?
It eats its way out.
What is worse than that?
It comes back for seconds.
Stephen Hawking died crossing the road. He was hit by a Universal Serial Bus.
You know the difference between happy tailgaters and angry tailgaters?
Happy tailgaters know how to throw a party.
What do you call a bitch?
You call it a female dog.
What is a Jedi's favorite Italian dessert?
Obi-Wan Cannoli.
Yo mama is so stupid, she thought a jigsaw meant dancing with a saw!
My cat got run down. That is a cat-astrophe.
What do you call a moose that doesn't want to be known? Anonymoose.
What do you call a dog magician?
Labracadabrador!
You want a pizza from me!!!!
What's a pig's favorite ballet?
Swine Lake.
What did the fish say when it swam into a wall?
Dam.
I almost got run over by a car.
For the rest of the day I was taking the backseat as I was wheely tried.
Glad to present you a wood clock.
https://olegon.ru/clock/
Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it's probably shit.
When someone asks you for a beef (fight), just say you're a vegetarian.
Your mom has a bone to pick with me.
I told my dad to get me a packet of cigarettes, he never came back.
AND I still didn't get my FUCKING CIGARETTES!
[God creating the parrot] OK, HOW ABOUT A TYE-DYE CHICKEN THAT SCREAMS ACTUAL WORDS AT YOU?