There are five cows on a farm, one mamma cow and four baby calves. The first baby walks up to the mom and asks, “Momma, why is my name Rose?” The mommy cow replies, “Well honey, a rose petal fell on your head when you were born.” The next calf comes up and asks, “Momma, why is my name Lily?” The mother replies, “Because honey, a lily petal fell on your head when you were born.” The third baby comes up and asks, “Momma, why is my name Daisy?” The momma cow again replieds" Well, when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head." The final baby walks over and says, “Huh Ruh Buh Duh!” The momma cow says, “Shut up, Cinderblock!”
Whats worse than five dead babies in one garbage can?
- 1 dead baby in 5 garbage cans.
How do you stop a baby from drowning?
-Lift up your foot
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The driver says: 'Ugh, that’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to the man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!” The man says: “You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”
What’s the difference between a baby and a baked potato?
About 140 calories.
What’s worse than 3 babies in one trashcan? One baby in three trashcans.
How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb? Must be more than 13, because my bas....t is still dark
What’s the difference between a baby and a salad?
Most people don’t get angry when you toss a salad.
whats the difference between a baby and an onion? i cry when i chop up an onion
What is worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. What’s worse than that? The one at the bottom is still alive. What is worse still? It has to eat its way out. What’s worse than that? It went back for seconds.
Babies can spread a nasty smell,
especially when you haven’t fed them for a month.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall-----Depends on how hard you throw them
If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child.
Smaller babies may be delivered by a stork, But bigger ones need a crane.
I thought my vasectomy would keep my wife from getting pregnant, but apparently it just changes the color of the baby.
what is the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of babies?
U can’t unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitch fork.
A baby skunk’s mother gets hit by a car, so the baby skunk doesn’t know what he is. So the baby skunk walks up to a baby bunny and asks ‘What are you?’, the baby bunny replies ‘Well I’m a baby bunny. What are you?’ the baby skunk says 'Well I don’t know am I a baby bunny too?' the baby bunny says ‘No you’re not a baby bunny.’ so the baby skunk asks 'Well what am I then?' the baby bunny replies ‘Well you’re not exactly blank and you’re not exactly white so you must be Mexican.’
Q. How many babies does it take to shingle a roof?
A. Depends how thin you slice them.
Little Jonny walks in on his parents having sex. He asks what their doing and the father says: “Well…We’re making you a brother.” So little Jonny runs off to let his parents finish, happy that he’s going to have a brother soon. The next day when little Jonny’s father comes come Jonny is crying out on the driveway. The father sits down next to Jonny and asks what’s wrong. Jonny cries: “I won’t have a baby brother!” HIs father is confused. “What do you mean?” He asks. “Because the mailman came by today and ate him!”
What’s the difference between fruit and dead babies?
I don’t put fruit in a blender.