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There are five cows on a farm, one mamma cow and four baby calves. The first baby walks up to the mom and asks, “Momma, why is my name Rose?” The mommy cow replies, “Well honey, a rose petal fell on your head when you were born.” The next calf comes up and asks, “Momma, why is my name Lily?” The mother replies, “Because honey, a lily petal fell on your head when you were born.” The third baby comes up and asks, “Momma, why is my name Daisy?” The momma cow again replieds" Well, when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head." The final baby walks over and says, “Huh Ruh Buh Duh!” The momma cow says, “Shut up, Cinderblock!”

What’s the difference between a baby and a baked potato?

About 140 calories.

How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb? Must be more than 13, because my basement is still dark

What’s the difference between a baby and a salad?

Most people don’t get angry when you toss a salad.

What’s worse than 3 babies in one trashcan? One baby in three trashcans.

Babies can spread a nasty smell,

especially when you haven’t fed them for a month.

whats the difference between a baby and an onion? i cry when i chop up an onion

What is worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. What’s worse than that? The one at the bottom is still alive. What is worse still? It has to eat its way out. What’s worse than that? It went back for seconds.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall-----Depends on how hard you throw them

Why are babies called bundles of joys? When you break the bundle, it gives you joy.

What did the deaf, blind, mute, and paralyzed baby get for Christmas?

AIDS.

A baby skunk’s mother gets hit by a car, so the baby skunk doesn’t know what he is. So the baby skunk walks up to a baby bunny and asks ‘What are you?’, the baby bunny replies ‘Well I’m a baby bunny. What are you?’ the baby skunk says 'Well I don’t know am I a baby bunny too?' the baby bunny says ‘No you’re not a baby bunny.’ so the baby skunk asks 'Well what am I then?' the baby bunny replies ‘Well you’re not exactly blank and you’re not exactly white so you must be Mexican.’

What goes 100mph and bounces up and down? A baby tied to the back of a truck.

what is the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of babies?

U can’t unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitch fork.

Smaller babies may be delivered by a stork, But bigger ones need a crane.

If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child.

What’s worse then a baby in a trash can?

A baby in 10 trash cans.

How do you fit a baby in a bowl… a blender… and how do you get it out?

Tortilla chips

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The driver says: 'Ugh, that’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to the man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!” The man says: “You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”

How do you get 500 dead baby’s into a car? A blender

How do you get 500 dead baby’s out of a car? A straw