Chuck Norris and Superman had a bet. The loser had to wear their underwear on their pants.

Chuck Norris has been to Mars…that’s why there is no signs of life there.

One time Chuck Norris peed in the gas tank of a semi truck as a practical joke. That truck is now known as Optimus Prime.

Chuck Norris once heard nothing can kill him. So he tracked down nothing and killed it.

Chuck Norris wins a staring contest. – Against Medusa.

Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.

Chuck Norris doesn’t flush the toilet.

He scares the shit out of it.

Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 20 people, then it exploded.

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

If Chuck Norris was a Spartan in the Movie 300, the movie would be called 1.

Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect 4 in only three moves.

Chuck Norris was a kamikaze pilot. 12 times.

“Chuck? How many push-ups can you do?” – “All of them.”

Chuck Norris has a bear rug in his living room. It’s not dead or anything, it’s just too scared to nove

Chuck Norris can pick an apple from an orange tree and make the best lemonade you’ve ever tasted.

Chuck Norris doesn’t dial the wrong number. You answered the wrong telephone.

There once was a street named Chuck Norris-They had to change the name because no one crosses Chuck Norris and lives

Chuck Norris knows Victoria’s Secret.

A cobra once bit Chuck Norris. After hours of agonising pain… it died.

Death once had a near Chuck Norris experience…