Chuck Norris was shot with a gun. The bullet was critically injured.

One time Chuck Norris peed in the gas tank of a semi truck as a practical joke. That truck is now known as Optimus Prime.

Chuck Norris and Superman had a bet. The loser had to wear their underwear on their pants.

Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 20 people, then it exploded.

Chuck Norris doesn’t dial the wrong number. You answered the wrong telephone.

Chuck Norris once heard nothing can kill him. So he tracked down nothing and killed it.

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Chuck Norris has been to Mars…that’s why there is no signs of life there.

Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect 4 in only three moves.

“Chuck? How many push-ups can you do?” – “All of them.”

Chuck Norris can gargle peanut butter

Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.

Chuck Norris once stepped on a Lego.

The Lego broke in half.

Chuck Norris wins a staring contest. – Against Medusa.

Chuck Norris was a kamikaze pilot. 12 times.

Chuck Norris caught all the Pokémon – from a landline.

chuck Norris get`s pulled over by cop and the cop gets a ticket

Chuck Norris sleeps with the light on, not because he is afraid of the darkness, but because the darkness is afraid of him.

Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He just stares them down and gets the information he wants.

Chuck Norris can pick an apple from an orange tree and make the best lemonade you’ve ever tasted.