Chuck Norris and Superman had a bet. The loser had to wear their underwear on their pants.

One time Chuck Norris peed in the gas tank of a semi truck as a practical joke. That truck is now known as Optimus Prime.

Chuck Norris once heard nothing can kill him. So he tracked down nothing and killed it.

Chuck Norris has been to Mars…that’s why there is no signs of life there.

Chuck Norris doesn’t flush the toilet.

He scares the shit out of it.

Chuck Norris has a bear rug in his living room. It’s not dead or anything, it’s just too scared to nove

Chuck Norris wins a staring contest. – Against Medusa.

Chuck Norris sleeps with the light on, not because he is afraid of the darkness, but because the darkness is afraid of him.

Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 20 people, then it exploded.

Chuck Norris doesn’t dial the wrong number. You answered the wrong telephone.

If Chuck Norris was a Spartan in the Movie 300, the movie would be called 1.

Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.

Chuck Norris was a kamikaze pilot. 12 times.

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

“Chuck? How many push-ups can you do?” – “All of them.”

There once was a street named Chuck Norris-They had to change the name because no one crosses Chuck Norris and lives

Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect 4 in only three moves.

Chuck Norris can pick an apple from an orange tree and make the best lemonade you’ve ever tasted.

They say Chuck Norris’s tears cure cancer, too bad he doesn’t cry

Chuck Norris knows Victoria’s Secret.

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