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So I hooked up with a girl at a party, but I forgot that it was a family reunion. (SWEET HOME ALABAMA STARTS PLAYING

i cought my girlfriend cheating on me, with our dad.

When your crush walks in class but youre homeschooled…

How do you circumcise a hill billy… Kick his sister in the jaw

When you’re your boss’s daughter, then you realize that you are self-employed.

when you use instead of tinder

So I caught my girlfriend masturbating with a carrot. My first reaction was “Shit, I was gonna eat that later, but now it’s gonna taste like carrots!”

What’s the best part about plowing your cousin?

-It makes your sister jealous

Johnny: Mommy, Mommy! What is incest? Mom: Shut up and keep licking.

I saw a cute coworker and had sex in the back till i realized it is a family buisness

Name Something you practiced kissing on as a kid.


I would name my daughter awesome so I can tell people that I’m awesome.

So there I was, having a fantastic time going down on my nan When suddenly I got a nasty taste in my mouth.

“Wait a minute” I said. This distinctly tastes like horse semen

Then it clicked. “Ah, so that’s how you died”

The sexual shout “Yes Daddy” probably originated in alabama

My sister’s bf is mad at me cuz I f...ed his girl

What do you call a redneck sister who runs faster than her brothers?

A virgin.

Yesterday my daughter was playing in the garden when i saw her kill a butterfly. I told her that as a punishment, she won’t eat butter for 1 month. Today i saw her killing a cockroach in the kitchen. I told her “nice try”.

How do you circumcise a redneck?

You kick his sister in the jaw

Yesterday I was my sister and she said’ you f... a lot like dad I said “really mum said that too.”

How do you circumcise someone from Alabama? Kick his sisters jaw