Bought my son a trampoline for his birthday, the ungrateful f...er just sat in his wheelchair and cried

To the guy in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket… You can hide, but you can’t run.

My girlfriend broke up with me because I stole her wheelchair.

But I knew she’d come crawling back to me.

  • Mommy, i want a bicycle !!
  • Shut up Sam! You’ve already have your wheelchair!

Ever since I needed a wheelchair, my husband has been so rude. He’s been pushing me around and talking behind my back.

What is the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?

The wheelchair

What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?

Virgin mobile.

I met a guy in a wheelchair today. His face was battered and bruised. “What happened to your face?” I asked.

“I’m a Paralympian,” he replied.

“Boxing?”

“No, … hurdles.”

What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user? – Meals on wheels.

I can’t stand being in a wheelchair.

I should be ashamed of myself for making all these jokes at the expense of the disabled! after all, they can’t even stand up for themselves

How can you tell when a cabbage is boiled? The wheelchair floats to the top

A drunk man walked out of a bar and kept falling flat on his face. He wondered why this was until his wife spoke to him: Wife: why is your face all bloody? Husband: I was so drunk that I couldn’t stand up so I kept falling on my face! Wife: idiot. You left your wheelchair at the bar!

My son is so ungrateful. I bought him a trampoline and he just sat in is wheelchair and cried.

You’d think my son would be happy that Daddy bought him a new bike. But no… oh no he just sits in his wheelchair and cries like a little girl.

How do you execute a retard

The Electric Wheelchair

What’s the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? – The wheelchair.

Q: Where do you find a quadriplegic? A: Right where you left em.

You guys should be ashamed of yourselves, making fun of the disabled. After all they can’t stand up for themselves

surely people would consider putting pedals on wheelchairs so that they’re arms don’t get tired…

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