"Why do people in the Deep South, especially Alabama, like Kelly Clarkson more than Taylor Swift, Beyoncé, or Adele? Is it because Kelly is a MAGA Republican?"

"Moreso because Kelly Clarkson forces herself on her 2-year-old daughter, that's why she's so endearing to them."

Yeah, Asians have squinty eyes, but that's because they have had the displeasure of seeing so many ugly obese Americans in one place.

A sign that broadcast television has less impact on the masses: The force-feeding of Kelly Clarkson on network television has yet to impact the large stacks of Kelly Clarkson CDs collecting dust in Goodwill, right next to those James Last LPs.

The only reason why Murrikkkunts think Canada isn't free is because incest is illegal in Canada, in which one can face a sentence as long as 14 years in prison if convicted.

How did Donald Trump win Alabama twice?

By declaring that he has a crush on his daughter!

What's the difference between Donald Trump and Derek Vinyard?

A shaved head, a chest tattoo, and a moustache.

What did Donald Trump serve Justin Trudeau at the state dinner?

Poutine in traditional Russian dressing!

Why is Donald Trump so jealous of Usain Bolt?

Because he successfully finished a race!

Yo hairline is so long when u looked in a mirror u saw an entire endangered species

How can a person from Alabama tell that someone is an illegal immigrant?

If they are dating someone that isn't related to them.

why are people from New York so bad at chess? < Because they quickly lose two towers (rooks)

this is not a joke but if your uncle tells you, "{ bend over, touch your toes, i'll show you were the monster goes." don't do it hehhehehehehe.

What's the difference between a cop and bacon?

Bacon is full of fat and makes you feel good a Cop is full of shit and will make you feel their hot steamy cock as they ram it up your ass with some justice sprinkled on top