How do you get four prostitutes on one chair?
You turn it upside down.
What's the difference between a rooster and a prostitute?
The rooster says... "cock-a-doodle-doo." The prostitute says... "any cock will do."
What's the difference between a prostitute and a drug dealer?
The prostitute can wash her crack and sell it again.
Q: What does a dead prostitute and a swimming pool have in common?
A: They're both cold when you first get in, but warm up after a few strokes.
What's a perfect example of poor management? A prostitute getting pregnant.
You gotta hand it to blind prostitutes.
Why did the orphan become a prostitute? They wanted someone to call "daddy."
What do you call a prostitute with a major in math?
The thot that counts.
What's the best part about a dead prostitute?
The second hour is free.
What do painters and prostitutes have in common?
They're both paid for a good finish.
What's the difference between a prostitute and a daredevil?
One has cunning stunts, whilst the other has a stunning...
I didn't come into the prostitution business...
It came into me.
What do a fisherman and a prostitute have in common?
They're both hookers.
A guy is bankrupt, so he gives his son a duck and tells him to go sell it for as much as he can. So the kid goes on the street to sell the duck. A prostitute walks by and says, "I'll f--ck you for $10." The boy says, "I would, but I don't have any money." She says, "Ok, I'll take the duck instead." He says, "Ok," so they go upstairs and f--ck. The prostitute says, "That's the best sex I've ever had. I'll give you the duck back, and we can do it again." So they do, and he gets the duck back. But when they go downstairs, the duck gets hit by a car. And the guy that hit the duck feels so bad that he gives the kid $25. So when he gets home, his father asks him why he looks so tired. The boy says, "Well, I got a f--ck for a duck, a duck for a f--ck, and $25 for a f--cked up f--ck."
What do a prostitute and peanut butter have in common?
They both spread for bread.
What do magicians and prostitutes have in common?
Answer: disappearing acts.
In what ways do nuns and hoes have something in common?
They both worship on their knees. They are both creatures of habit. They both take vows of poverty and obedience. Once chosen, neither can leave the life. They both swallow their hosts.
When a military person dies, we shoot all night. When a drunkard dies, we drink all night. When a Christian dies, we pray all night. What if a prostitute dies? What should we do? Please tell me.
How does a prostitute make more than a drug dealer?
Because she can clean her crack and sell it again.
Man to woman: "Would you sleep with me for one million dollars?"
Woman: "Sure."
Man: "How about for ten dollars?"
Woman: "What do you think I am?"
Man: "We’ve already established what you are. All we’re doing is negotiating price."
