A man walks into the library. “Hello ma’am I’d like to borrow a book about committing suicide” The librarian replies, “No,you won’t give it back”
I don’t call it suicide. I call it population control
Are you suicide, cause you’re always on my mind
Suicide is never the answer Suicide is the question The answer is yes
The more suicidal people there are the less suicidal people there are
Last week I told my psychiatrist, “I keep thinking about suicide,” and he told me from now on I have to pay in advance.
Who’s the fastest reader
Me cause I’ll be jumping off so many stories
There’s nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt.
I believe “Self-Babtism” is a nice way of saying “Failed Suicide Attempt”
I’m going to hang myself in the bathroom at school and put a note telling kids that I’m a piñata
What do suicidal people do in their spare time?
I saw a man sitting on the ledge of a bridge the other day, and asked him what was wrong. He responded with nobody loves me, so i told him that may be true but you dont wanna kill yourself you want to die of old age, or at least be murdered, suicide is for the weak. he responded with your right so I pushed him over the bridge, and he died of murder
My mom ask stop making joke about suicide I answer- don’t worry …I stop soon
To the guy asking what joy I find in suicide jokes, the answer is simple. I make suicide jokes to cope with my crippling depression. Must be working, cause I’m still here
where do suicide bombers go when they die? everywhere!
There are going so many things through my head. Sadly none of it is a 9mm.
Suicide is illegal because it’s a crime to destroy government property.
What makes suicide illegal?
I am a failure to everyone and decided to attemp a suicide, guess what? I failed
Friend #1: “Yo guys, what’s the most unfair game you’ve ever played? For me it’s Fortnite.”
Friend #2: “I’d have to say Monopoly.”
Me: “The most unfair game you say? Life, definitely. Like, no one wins, it’s a one-way game.”
Friend #2: “Uhh…that’s not exactly what he meant…”
Friend #1: calls the suicide hotline