Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

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I was sitting on my own in a restaurant, when I saw a beautiful woman at another table. I sent her a bottle of the most expensive wine on the menu. She sent me a note, “I will not touch a drop of this wine unless you can assure me that you have seven inches in your pocket.” I wrote back, “Give me the wine. As gorgeous as you are, I'm not cutting off three inches for anyone.”

Maria went home happy, telling her mother about how she earned $20 by climbing a tree. Her mom responded, "Maria, they just wanted to see your panties!" Maria replied, "See Mom, I was smart, I took them off!"

Beer Bottle: “You break me, you get one year of bad luck!”

Mirror: “You kiddin' me? You break me, then y'all get seven years of bad luck!”

Condom: “Hahaha...”

Scientists have proven that there are two things in the air that have been known to cause women to get pregnant: their legs.

During a discussion at Sunday school, a nun asks the children what they think God takes you by when you die. A kid responds, "I think God takes you by your feet, because once I walked into my parents room and my mom's feet were in the air and she was screaming, "Oh God, I'm coming!!!"

Politicians and diapers have one thing in common: they should both be changed regularly... and for the same reason. Trump and Biden didn’t get the memo.

I was walking down the street and I punched of a white guy and then I was arrested for assault. The next day after I got out, I punched a black guy and I was arrested for impersonating a police officer.

I was at a train station and a woman ran up to me and asked is this train running on time, I said no it runs on steam and coal

BlessedBrian’s AUTOBIOGRAPHY would be titled “The Adventure of Watching Paint Dry”

I would roast BlessedBrian, but it seems LIFE already did a thorough job

What's the traditional food of black Jews? - kosher watermelon...

Why did the rapper become a chef?

Because he wanted to cook up some FIRE BARS