What's the difference between a priest and Woody from Toy Story?
Woody goes limp when a kid walks in the room.
Worst Jokes Ever
So, I was in the woods the other day raping this woman when she screamed, 'Please! Think of my children!'
I thought, 'Ooo, you kinky bitch.'
Roses are red, Epstein's face turned blue.
Trump's on that list, And there's nothing he can do.
"Now buzz off" - Explain Bear
What's the difference between a Corvette and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a Corvette in my garage.
There are people weirder looking than me.
Like who?
Like people with Down syndrome.
Why didn't Michael Jackson get away with messaging with kids? Because they were all juveniles.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know what a home looks like.
Did you hear about the lesbians who are suing their contractor?
He used nails when they wanted tongue and groove.
The only thing funnier than the shooting of that healthcare CEO is imagining the look on his wife's face when she got the hospital bill.
My doctor told me I had Alzheimer’s.
I said to him, “I don’t remember asking.”
What has four legs and one arm?
A Rottweiler in a children’s playground.
I’d pound your mom so fast, even Sonic would get jealous!
What’s the worst thing about having a daughter with cancer?
You can’t pull on her hair when you’re raping her.
Why did the straight white caucasian male cross the road?
Because a black person was approaching.
What do you call a gay T-Rex?
A tyranno-sore-ass!
What happens if a cookie turns emo?
It becomes a cookie cutter.
What do you call a tent for lesbians?
Finger Hut.
Why is pounding your mom like playing video games?
Because once you start, you just can’t stop until you win!
How do you stop all homophobic heterosexual white men from using all public men's restrooms at a rest area?
Make sure that all public men's restrooms at the rest area are always occupied with gay men that have long and thick big cocks, regardless of skin color.
