Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Did you hear about the lesbians who are suing their contractor?

He used nails when they wanted tongue and groove.

My doctor told me I had Alzheimer’s.

I said to him, “I don’t remember asking.”

Why did the straight white caucasian male cross the road?

Because a black person was approaching.

What’s the worst thing about having a daughter with cancer?

You can’t pull on her hair when you’re raping her.

Why is pounding your mom like playing video games?

Because once you start, you just can’t stop until you win!

How do you stop all homophobic heterosexual white men from using all public men's restrooms at a rest area?

Make sure that all public men's restrooms at the rest area are always occupied with gay men that have long and thick big cocks, regardless of skin color.

Lemme tell you a little story.

It’s night. You’re in your room, trying to sleep. But you keep hearing it—scratching. Soft at first. Like fingernails on wood. You tell yourself it’s rats, or the house settling. But it keeps going. Slow... then faster.

So finally, you get outta bed. You get on your hands and knees, put your ear to the floor. And you hear it. A voice. Whispers. Crying.

Your heart’s pounding. You grab a crowbar. You pry up the floorboards. One by one. Your sweat’s dripping into the dust. The noise gets louder.

And finally... you peel back the last plank.

And you see these eyes. Wide and terrified. And a pale little face staring up at you.

BOOOOOOO!!!!

It’s Anne Frank.

How do you know when you have been invited to a gay barbecue?

When you are unable to distinguish foot-long hot dogs from long and thick big dicks, regardless of skin color.

What do a 9V battery and a butthole have in common?

We know we’re not supposed to put our tongue on them, but we do it anyway.

How do you find a black person in the dark without a flashlight?

Tell them a joke to make them smile.