Intimacy

Intimacy Jokes

I have just started a sexual relationship with a blind woman. It's very rewarding, but quite challenging. -- Took me ages to get her husband's voice right.

7

Sex is like math

You add a bed 🛌

Subtract the clothes👚👕👖👙

Divide the legs🪢

And pray you don’t multiply 👨‍❤️‍👨👩‍❤️‍👨👩‍❤️‍👩

A woman comes to the doctor and tells her ‘doctor, my husband wants intense sex all day, what should I give him?’ The doctor says ‘my number’

7

A girl and boy are in bed after sex. The boy goes “I can’t believe they got together after all that shit” girl says “who” boy goes “ my ass cheeks”

A sex addict man meets a rich man around Christmas.

The sex addict asks the rich man, "What are you getting your wife this Christmas?" The rich man replies, "Diamond earrings and a Mercedes." The sex addict asks, "Why are you getting her two gifts?" The rich man says, "Well, if she doesn't like the earrings then she can drive to the store and exchange them."

The sex addict nods. Then the rich man asks him, "So what are you getting your wife this year?" The sex addict thinks about it for a second and replies, "A gold necklace and a dildo."

The rich man asks, "Why those two things?" The sex addict astutely reponds, "This way, if she doesn't like the jewelry she can go f... herself."

What turns a girl on more than having sex with her

When she finds out that you have a vibrator too

1

I was having sex with my girl and she said she likes it rough so i socked her in the face.

1