Monkey Jokes

Today I learned humans eat more bananas than monkeys. -- I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey.


Five little monkeys jumping on the bed,

One fell off and bumped his head.

The momma called the doctor and the doctor said...

“We’re calling Child Protective Services.”

One time, I worked at the zoo and I was feeding the monkeys.

And one of them µяɨɲąţ€ď on me.

And I went to the hospital and got a bloody nose the next day

5 five little monkeys jumping on a bed

One fell of and bumped his head mamma called Walmart and walmart said

We will give you a replacement

A man walks into the taxidermist with two monkeys. The taxidermist asked if he wanted them mounted. The man said, "No. Shaking hands will be fine."

Wanted to go to the zoo, it was too packed so I went to KFC instead, their monkey enclosure is better anyway

Whats the difference between a Mexican and a Black person? One gets paid, the other got enslaved. (Written by Paragon Dart Monkey)