Big Jim

@bigjim

Registered on 1/1/2025 · No followers yet · Last active 10 months ago

Police

Big Jim · 10 months ago

They had to teach him a lesson

A photo shows three police officers (two men and one woman) standing with a young boy on a sidewalk in a residential area. The boy is holding a pizza box. The text beneath the image describes a scenario where a 15-year-old misused 911 to order pizza. The police initially delivered the pizza to teach him a lesson, followed by the dark punchline: "Then shot him 20 times."

Baptism

Big Jim · 10 months ago

COVID was a different ERA

Inside a church, a couple holds a baby dressed in white for a baptism. A priest, wearing a surgical mask and dressed in white vestments, stands across the baptismal font, pointing a pink, handheld sprayer or squirt gun at the baby to administer the water from a distance. The text reads: "This was the most insane stage of the pandemic."

Skull

Big Jim · 11 months ago

… none of the above..

Two skull-shaped bathroom fixtures are shown side-by-side. On the left is a white toilet shaped like a skull, with the text "Spooky dookie?". On the right is a white urinal also shaped like a skull, with the text "Or... Creepy peepee".

Age

Big Jim · 11 months ago

It took me a second to realize

A serious-looking man with a beard, identified as Gustavo Fring, wearing a light-colored suit jacket, a red shirt, and a red tie, stands in front of a dark blue background. To his right, white text in a blocky font outlines a simple mathematical sequence: "take your age add 21 subtract 11 subtract 10 that's your age".

Hammer

Big Jim · 11 months ago

It could be if you believe

Braille

Big Jim · 11 months ago

Amazing idea

A split image shows two white square highway signs with a black border. Both signs display '70' in large black numbers and have the word 'SPEED' (or a misspelling of it) above. The left sign correctly says 'SPEED 70' with Braille dots below the numbers. The right sign misspells it as 'SP EEED 70' and also has Braille dots below the numbers. Above the signs, text reads: 'SHARE IF YOU AGREE HIGHWAY SIGNS SHOULD BE WRITTEN IN BRAILLE SO THAT BLIND DRIVERS DONT GET LOST. ONE LIKE ONE PRAYER! TYPE AMEN IN TGE COMMENTS'.

Pumpkin

Big Jim · 11 months ago

Y he look like dat

A large orange pumpkin sits on a kitchen counter, partially carved. It has small, round eyes and a wide, gaping mouth, giving it a goofy or startled expression. The lower part of the mouth carving is left thick, resembling a chin or lower jaw. In the background, carving tools, a bowl of pumpkin seeds, and a bat-shaped carving template are visible, suggesting the carving process is underway.

Dolphin

Big Jim · 11 months ago

Any suggestions? Anything helps

A picture shows a deer swimming in blue water. The text below the image reads: 'I think my dolphin has autism'.

President

Big Jim · 11 months ago

🫡

A black and white image depicting two men shaking hands. The man on the left, with a beard and a hat, resembles Abraham Lincoln. The man on the right is a Black man, looking towards Lincoln. The text overlaid on the image reads: "President Abraham Lincoln meets the first freed slave after the signing The Emancipation Proclamation in 1863:".

Candy

Big Jim · 1 year ago

If you think about it, taking candy from a baby is good because candy is bad for babies.

Frog

Big Jim · 1 year ago

What happened to the frog that partied illegally?

He got TOAD away!

French People

Big Jim · 1 year ago

Why do French people eat snails?

Because they don’t like fast food.

Mountain

Big Jim · 1 year ago

Why can you never surprise mountains?

They peak.

Plumber

Big Jim · 1 year ago

What kind of fruit can fix your sink?

A plum-ber.

German

Big Jim · 1 year ago

What do you call a German that can not see?

A Not-see.