Humor
Americans prefer houses with basements. In fact, they're best cellars!
What did the diver say when he was trapped in seaweed?
- Kelp!
A puma was making another puma laugh. That puma that was laughing said, “Stop making me laugh! I’m gonna puma pants!”
I'll stop with the horrible puns if you can say a good joke.
Why did all the numbers laugh at 22? Because it had "tu tu's."
Memes
Cremation: Your last chance for a smoking hot body.
What did the Ford Mustang say to the crowd of innocent people?
I'D HIT THAT!
Q. What sound does a sleeping T-Rex make?
A. A dino-snore.
Why can’t you tell a funny joke to a wheelchair kid? Because he just rolls with the joke.
People wonder why our generation grew up so sarcastic.
"Hey, how do I look?"
"With your eyes, Joe."
I tried out some puns to make people laugh, but no pun in ten did.
I had a joke about pizza, it's just too cheesy.
What did one skeleton say to the other?
Skeleton 1: "I need a hand!"
Skeleton 2: (Throws up hand)
Skeleton 1: "That wasn't very humerus."
Skeleton 2: "Why do you have to be so heartless?"
Skeleton 1: "At least I had the guts to tell you!"
Puns about air conditioning. I'm not a fan.
Why did Harry fall out of the boat?
Because he's hooked!
What's the difference between America and a flash drive?
One is USA, the other is USB. 😂😂😂
What do you say when you wake up to the police trying to arrest you?
“C'mon, did ya really think I’d resist arrest?”
Chode.
A man once sued smart water for not making him smart. Then a woman replied, “Okay cool, now I’m going to go sue Thin Mints for not making me thin.”
Hey, you know those birds and lizards that feast on decaying flesh?
Oh, sorry, I shouldn't carrion about it.