Ben Dover

What's Peter Pan's favorite place to eat out?

Wendy's?

Why did the priest want to learn how to play the organ?

He wanted to be able to finger A minor.

What’s the difference between a priest and target?

Nothing, they both have children’s pants half off.

What's the difference between a peanut and a priest?

With a peanut, you have to break the shell open for the nut to come out.

What do you call California during a forest fire?

Completely normal.

I got a job at a library once. I got fired like an hour in because the library manager said that the cookbooks didn’t go into the women’s sports section.

What’s the difference between a prostitute and a Twinkie?

Nothing. They both squirt their white stuff when you eat it.

What’s the difference between an LGBTQ and brain cells?

Brain cells make up their mind.

What is the difference between a priest and anesthesia?

The anesthesia takes time to put you under.

Why is the queen the most powerful piece in chess?

Because the board looks like a kitchen floor.

ok this isn't a joke but it's funny.

Roses are red, nuts are brown, Skirts go up, pants go down. Body to body, skin to skin, when it's stiff, stick it in. It goes in dry, comes out wet, the longer it's in, the stronger it gets. It comes out dripping and starts to sag, It's not what you think, it's a lipton tea bag.

Get your mind out of the gutter.

What's the difference between Nemo and my dad?

Nemo was eventually found.