Sometimes i get jealous when my phone dies

Dont say your life is a joke because jokes got meaning.

The more suicidal people there are the less suicidal people there are

How do you get a depressed person out of a tree?

You cut the rope…

“Boom, quick; you have five seconds to give me three reasons to live.” “1…2…3 ……4…5…” Did you noticed you said nothing at all?

What is the worst motivational thing to say to a depressed person?

If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.

So my parents were telling me about this dark joke they made 17 years ago, but they didn’t actually tell me the joke.

If you were a food what would you be?

Friend 1-Pizza cause I’m so cheesy

Friend 2-Chocolate chip cookie cause I have lots of friends

Me-donut cause I’m so empty inside

Why did i walk across the road?

to get hit by a car

They say people are 75% water But I’m 100% useless

There’s nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt.

Are you suicide, cause you’re always on my mind

A man walks into the library. “Hello ma’am I’d like to borrow a book about committing suicide” The librarian replies, “No,you won’t give it back”

I don’t call it suicide. I call it population control

I cannot moderate myself at all. It’s either I don’t take my meds, or I take the entire bottle. Decisions decisions…

Whats a depressed persons favorite drink Depresso expresso Jk bleach

I woke up this morning thinking it was gonna be a great day. But then I realized I was still alive.

Are you a toaster? Bc I want to take a bath w you ;)

To whoever has my voodoo doll, please hold its hand.

“Go big or go home”, that’s what some people say.

“Go loud and proud”, that’s what other people say.

“Go out with a big, loud bang!”, that’s what I say.