Humor

"I hate going to weddings, because the old lady next to you always whispers in your ear, 'You're next.' So I started doing the same to them at funerals, 'You're next.'"

I don't call it suicide. I call it population control.

A wife asked her husband why he cheated on her. His reply was, "She was just lying there naked on the table, what was I supposed to do?" The wife replies, "Perform the fucking autopsy!"

My grandfather has the heart of a lion... And a lifetime ban from the zoo.

Yo momma so dumb, she thought this joke was funny.

Dark Humor is like a child with cancer. It never gets old.

Why are priests called father? Because it's too suspicious to call them daddy.

My mother wanted to test my responsibility and wanted me to cook dinner for the family to help me understand how it feels to constantly cook for a whole family. So, me with my horrible humor, decided to make a giant joke for when dinner time came around, and so I just got four plates and set them in front of my family and I then said, "Here you are, a fine African meal." Then everybody looked at me in disappointment, and then I continued to say, "What? Poor taste?"

You (DYM 53).

Ha, gay!

When I'm bored, I text a random number, "I hid the body... now what?"

Hey, Squidward, say "kid" backward. Also, suck my dick!

A man walks into the library. “Hello ma’am, I’d like to borrow a book about committing suicide.” The librarian replies, “No, you won’t give it back.”

I should probably stop making emo jokes.

They just don't seem to cut it anymore.

Your hairline looks like it was drawn onto your head.

I don't have time to write this joke.

Why can't the skeleton go to the prom?

Because he had no-BODY to go with!

"9/11" or just "7-Eleven" to a Mexican person.

These are just plain wrong jokes.

in (DYM 95)