Humor

We used to have Reagan, Jonny Cash, and Bob Hope. Now we have Biden, no cash, and no hope.

What did the cops say when someone called him racist?

"How can I be racist? My wife's eye is black."

Q: What is 9 + 11?

A: 9/11

What’s the difference between life and a rape joke?

Life fucks you until you stop breathing; a rape joke fucks you until it’s not funny anymore.

What is common with dark humor and unvaccinated kids?

Neither do ever grow old.

Guy, your hairline was the reason Adolf Hitler said, "Let there be war!"

Subway trying to commemorate 9/11: CRASH INTO SUBWAY THIS SUBTEMBER 11TH TO GET 2 FOOTLONG SUBS FOR ONLY $9.11, THAT'S 2 FOOTLONG SUBS FOR $9.11 AND WATCH THEM FALL... INTO YOUR MOUTH!

My mom told me a joke about boxing.

I guess I missed the punch line.

What did the mama moose say to the calf after it got on her nerves?

"I'm not a-moosed right now."

I think I'm a red zebra!! Cuz I'm stripped red, iykwim.

What is red, pink, and goes round and round?

A baby in a blender.

What is green, brown, and goes round and round?

The same baby 3 weeks later.

Joke: I went to a paraplegic strip club the other day, the place was crawling with pussy.

Sans: "Like, I'm so *flabbergasted*."

Gaster: "👌☼⚐ ✌☼☜ ✡⚐🕆 💧☜☼✋⚐🕆💧 ☼✋☝☟❄ ☠⚐🕈✍"

What do you call a premature Chinese baby birth? Wong Tai-Ming.

I have a joke about chemistry, but I don't think it will get a reaction.

What's the last thing Asians hear from their parents?

"My money is my money. Your money is my money. Your wife's money is my money. Always remember that, son."

Why did the cheese blush? Because it saw the salad dressing.

How do you find a black person in the dark without a flashlight?

Tell them a joke to make them smile.

You need a good place to think? You can sit on my lap, and we’ll see the first thing that pops up!

This joke's about flowers, the blue one's a violet.

Your mom's the Twin Towers and I am the pilot!