Midget

Midget jokes

Grass

Why do midgets laugh when they run?

Because the grass tickles their balls.

Weed

When midgets smoke weed, do they get high or do they get medium?

Memes

Notice

My midget landlord told me to pack my things up and that I've got 30 minutes to get out. That's short notice!

Neighbor

I asked my midget neighbor if he wanted a lift. He told me to "Fuck off!!!" I thought, what a cheeky cunt and zipped my backpack up and walked away.

Blowjob

What's the best thing about midgets??

They don't need to bend while giving blowjobs.

Man

Why don’t midgets fight? They walk away to be the bigger man.

Tampon

Why don't midgets use tampons?

Answer: They are always tripping over the string.

Prison

I was walking by a prison when I saw a midget in an orange jumpsuit climbing down the fence. When he hit the ground and sneered at me, I said, “Well, that’s a little condescending.”

Sir

I accidentally bumped into a midget yesterday.

Me: "Are you ok sir?"

Midget: "Well, I'm not happy."

Me: "Well, which one are ya?"

Woman

Why do women hate having sex with midgets?

Because of their shortcomings.