Short jokes
What was the last thought Jesus had before he died?
"Man, I could really use a crowbar right about now."
I'm a rapist.
Daughter: "Hey dad, how do you feel about abortion?" Father: "Ask your sister." Daughter: "I don't have a..."
What animal is best at hitting a baseball? -- A bat.
How do you say goodbye to a calculus teacher?
Calculator!
bradley
Yo mama's so fat that when she went sky diving, she caused another global extinction.
What is the opposite of a lady finger?
Answer: Mentos.
Why couldn't the orphan buy chips?
They were all family sized.
Why do orphans hate knock knock jokes?
Because there is never anyone at the door.
"Most Deadly Sport"
Playing chicken with a train!
Why is the Titanic good at baseball? Because it sinks it.
Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year?
Because they don't have Mother's and Father's day.
Why do priests play Geometry Dash? Cuz they can beat Demons.
What's the difference between WW2 kamikaze planes and 9/11?
One of the missions succeeded.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Spell.
Spell who?
W. H. O.
Me: *gets down on one knee*
Girlfriend: OMG, it's finally happening!
Me: *falls over*
Girlfriend: The poison is kicking in.
Robin Hood [hands over stolen fortune]: here you are, my poor friend.
Friend: Wow thanks, I'm rich!
Robin [narrows eyes]: You're what?
What's Technoblade's favorite show and is the only one he can relate to?
Peppa Pig: Peppa Dies!
what's a depressed person's favorite game?
hangman