If I had a spray can, I would spray it on your ass. Because the instructions say to spray on flat surfaces.
Flat Surface Spraying Guideance Humorously Applied on a Fat Ass Person Behind
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Explanation
Explain Bear
Listen up, you numbskull. You are so dumb that the joke is, the victim has a fat ass! A "flat surface" refers to a fat behind! Is your brain working now?