Fish

Fish Jokes

Girlfriend

Fishing and girlfriends are exactly alike. There may be plenty of fish in the sea, but until I find one, I'm stuck here holding my rod.

Scale

Why are fish easy to measure?

Because they bring their own scales.

Sea

Why did the fish cross the sea?

To get to the other tide! πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚

Bus

What's the difference between a bus full of children and a fish?

The fish can swim.

  • 0
  • Scale

    How does a fish always know how much they weigh? -- Because they have their own scales.

  • 0
  • Tuna

    Guy 1: "Tell me a bad pun."

    Guy 2: "Alright. What's the difference between a tuna fish, a piano, and a tube of glue?"

    Guy 1: "Ok, that last one was random as heck. What is the difference?"

    Guy 2: "You can tuna a piano, but you can't piano a tuna."

    Guy 1: "Ok, where does the glue come in?"

    Guy 2: "Ah, I knew you'd get stuck on that."

  • 3
  • Dam

    Two fish walked into a wall. One said to the other, "Dam!"

  • 2
  • Corner

    How do you confuse a fish?

    Put it in a round fishbowl and tell it to go to the corner!

    Penguin

    Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?

    Because they don’t have pockets. I’m

    Breakdance

    I had a gold fish who could breakdance on the carpet.

    For 20 seconds.

    And only once... :(

    Skin

    The other day I took my Grandma to one of those fish spas where the little fish eat your dead skin.

    It was way cheaper than having her buried in the cemetery.

  • 0