Short jokes
What does a sex offender and Santa have in common?
They will come down your "chimney" tonight.
What would a Down syndrome Ben 10 alien be called?
Chromostone.
What do you call a romance movie for Down syndrome people? Chromeo and Juliet.
What do you call a terrorist attack in Iraq? A selfie!
How can you tell if someone Amish is an alcoholic? They keep falling off the wagon.
When should you discourage your husband from exercising and dieting? When he wants to fit in your clothes!
Why did Bruce Jenner cross the road?
To see how the other side felt!
Someone told me I looked gay today. I told him that my clothes just came out of the closet this morning.
What do you call a party with 100 midgets? A little get together.
Why does no one die a virgin? Cause life fucks us all.
What is it you can give at Christmas and still keep? Herpes.
Why can't you play Uno with a Mexican? Because they'll steal all the green cards.
My lesbian friends bought me a gold timepiece for my birthday.
But, I think they got confused when I said, "I wanna watch!"
What's the difference between your job and a dead prostitute?
Your job still sucks!
Why is divorce so expensive?
Because it's worth it.
Q: Why is marriage not a word?
It's a life sentence!
Q: What's the difference between a smart Russian and a unicorn?
A: Nothing, they're both fictional characters.
What's the fastest way to break up a bingo game in Baghdad?
You shout out, "B-52!"
What do you call an Iraqi who owns a camel and a goat?
Bisexual.
Why is it called scissoring and not lip-syncing?