Short jokes
Emo grass cuts itself, while transgender laundry hangs itself.
What is the difference between Drake and Carrie Underwood?
Carrie Underwood kissed a 12-year-old boy on the lips.
What did Osama give the Windows on the World restaurant in the WTC as a rating when he ate it? A 9/11!
What is a little zombie's favorite stuffed animal?
It's a deady bear.
How do terrorists feed their babies?
"Here comes the aeroplane!"
I used to think that I had a Japanese friend, but it was just my imagi-asian.
What is 6-inch long, in every men's pants or hands, and girls want?
- A smartphone, freak.
What did the computer say when it was tired of the user?
Kiss my ASCII!
What is a Christian's favorite social networking site?
Faithbook!
Why did the deer go to the dentist?
It had buck teeth.
What do you call a lesbian pirate?
Red Beard.
What do black lesbians say about pussy?
"Smells like chicken, tastes like chicken."
Why did the emo trade his knife for a chainsaw?
- To win
Why are farts a nice break for emos?
They get to cut cheese.
What’s black and white and red all over?
A Milano’s cherry.
What’s the difference between Jesus and a prostitute?
The look they give you while you’re nailing them.
Why can't lesbians wear makeup while on a diet?
Because they can't eat Jenny Craig while Mary Kay is sitting on their face.
What’s the best thing about a blowjob?
The ten minutes of silence.
What attracted Jeffrey Dahmer to abortion clinics?
- He smelled veal.
What did Jeffrey Dahmer do when done with his black dates?
He dumped them.