There are five cows on a farm, one mamma cow and four baby calves. The first baby walks up to the mom and asks, “Momma, why is my name Rose?” The mommy cow replies, “Well honey, a rose petal fell on your head when you were born.” The next calf comes up and asks, “Momma, why is my name Lily?” The mother replies, “Because honey, a lily petal fell on your head when you were born.” The third baby comes up and asks, “Momma, why is my name Daisy?” The momma cow again replieds" Well, when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head." The final baby walks over and says, “Huh Ruh Buh Duh!” The momma cow says, “Shut up, Cinderblock!”
GlitzyGlamGirl (GGG)
I got my daughter a fridge for her birthday. I can’t wait to see her face light up when she opens it.
Why did the M&M go to school? It wanted to be a Smartie.
Why did the Oreo go to the dentist? Because he lost his filling.
How do poets say hello? Hey, haven’t we metaphor?
Did you hear about the two people who stole a calendar? They each got six months.
I told my wife* she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked at me surprised
*(P.S. I am not at that age plus I am as straight as an helix ruler)
What did the 0 say to the 8? Nice belt!
How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.
What’s the different between a cat and a comma? A cat has claws at the end of paws; A comma is a pause at the end of a clause.
WHAT DO YOU CALL A PARADE OF RABBITS HOPPING BACKWARDS?
a receding hare-line!!!!!
Where are average things manafactured? The satisfactory!
A woman in labour suddenly shouted "Shouldn't!, "Wouldn't", "Couldn't, Didn't, Can't"
"Don't worry", said the doc. "Those are just contractions"
Did you hear about the new restaurant called Karma? There's no menu you get what you deserve!
Helvetica and Times New Roman walk into a bar... "GET OUT OF HERE!!!" The Bartender shouts we don't serve your type!
Why do we tell actors to break a leg, because every play has a cast!
A pun, a play on words and a limmerick walk into a bar.
No joke!
PERSON: I need to go so bad!
TOILET: Long time no pee!!!
Hey guys! It's Triple G you can give me more ideas on jokes, mainly Fish and Sea jokes as those are the jokes I specialise and only do best on the comment section below. Please do feel free to thumbs down and comment on improvements as well as thumbsing up and saying what you liked! :)
Au revouir, GGG
Where do fish sleep?
On a seabed!