Banter jokes

Immigration jokes just cross the line.

Friend: Stop with the self harm jokes, they're not funny.

Me: It's not that deep. I'll cut it out.

It's funny dating someone smarter than you. My girlfriend knows how to push my buttons but never takes into account what a dick I can be if need be. Let me explain. Say, for example, she calls me retarded, I remind her that she's dating me.

Me: I need a good roast.

My friend: Take me!

Me and my friend roasting each other.

Him: Your dad dropped you on purpose, but my dad dropped me by accident.

Me: But after dropping you, he never picked you up.

You’ve got something on your face. Wait, no, it’s just missing something. My dick.

My grandpa and your hairline go way back.

Me: Do you like smash?

Friend: Smash Rolls?

Me: No, Smash DEEZ NUTS!

Friend: AHHHHH (*moans)

What did Jim say to Jeff?

"I killed your ham."

I have two things I wanna say:

1. When people swear, stop taking it so fucking literally. If someone calls you a bitch, they're not calling you a female dog. If they call you a cunt, they're not calling you a woman's private part, they are calling you either an idiot, scaredy cat/baby, or something along those lines, ffs.

2. wtf

Why do some couples make their status "single" after a small argument? Like, I don't put "orphan" after I get into an argument with my family.

What does it mean when a man has a dodgy past? It means he has skeletons in his closet.

What does it mean when a man likes Lana Del Rey better than Ed Sheeran? It means he has a closet full of women's leather pants (but no women in their dating history).

Turn the comments into a kindergarten fight.

Update: I got banned from BIGO Live.

Could a phone booth also be called a chatterbox?