After my wife died, I couldn't even look at another woman for 10 years.
But now that I'm out of jail, I can honestly say it was worth it!
If being ugly was a crime, you would get a life sentence.
The judge asked me, "How does 5 to 10 years sound?"
I said, "Sexy."
In Soviet Russia, gay sex gets you arrested.
In America, getting arrested gets you gay sex.
What is the difference between giving money to a church and giving money to the IRS?
If you stop giving money to a church, you won't go to prison.
Some people think "prison" is one word, but to robbers, it's a whole sentence.
Nutted in her braces, now my kids are behind bars.
Where did Hitler send kids with ADHD?
Concentration camp.
A prisoner was told how he'll be executed. Needless to say, he was shocked.
Why did the picture go to jail? Cause it was framed!
The only reason why Murrikkkunts think Canada isn't free is because incest is illegal in Canada, in which one can face a sentence as long as 14 years in prison if convicted.
What did the pedophile say when he got out of prison?
I feel like a kid again.
Did you hear about the fortune telling dwarf that escaped from prison?
Reports say there's a small medium at large!
Why did Yoda go to jail for rape?
He doesn't get consent he just uses the force.
What is a prisoner's favorite punctuation?
A period.
Why?
Because it marks the end of a sentence.
What kind of star ⭐️ would go to jail?
A shooting star 🌠!
How do you escape a French prison?
Yell angrily in German.
My brother is ugly one time he stuck his head out the window, the police arrested for mooning
I saw a dwarf scaling down a prison wall. I thought to myself, "That's a little condescending."
Why do orphans become criminals? Because they want to know what it's like to be wanted.
