Prison Jokes

Some people think prison is one word...but to robbers it’s a whole sentence

A prisoner was told how he'll be executed. Needless to say, he was shocked.

What is a prisoner's favorite punctuation?

A period.

Why?

Because it marks the end of a sentence.

My doctor said I only have 1 year to live, so I killed him. Got sentenced to life in prison, problem solved!

Whats a prisoners favorite game?

Hangman!

Why is a white guy in prison scarier than a black guy in prison.

The white guy actually did it.

Did you hear about the fortune telling dwarf that escaped from prison?

Reports say there's a small medium at large!

What's the difference between an escaped prisoner and an orphan?

Only one is wanted.

How do you escape a French prison?

Yell angrily in German.

I saw a dwarf scaling down a prison wall. I thought to myself,... That's a little condescending 😊

What's black and white and red all over? The prisoner I just hit with my car.

What do you call a vegetable who has escaped prison?

An escapea.

I have cancer the doctor said I have 3 days to live but I was like fuck it and killed him the jury said I have life in prison I shouted yes he said thank you you saved my life

Why did the guitarist go to prison? Cause he fingered A minor

What did the pedophile say when he got out of prison?

I feel like a kid again.

i saw a cuban prisoner i asked why are you running from the cops he said IM FREE AT LAST.

A cement mixer has ­collided with a prison van. Motorists are asked to look out for 16 hardened criminals.

What do you get if you cross a gorilla and a prisoner? A kong-vict.

What's the scariest thing about white people in prison? How rare they are.

How do prisoners call each other? Cell phones