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A woman goes into labor with her child. The doctor says that they have invented a new device to transfer the pain of child birth to the father. He asks if it is ok to use the new device. The couple agrees and so he turns the pain to the father to 10%. The man feels nothing. They then bump it up to 20%. He still feels nothing. They keep doing this until they have the machine up to 100%. The man still felt nothing so they go home happy, until they find the milkman dead on the porch.

I invented a new word today.


Why did they invent glow in the dark condoms So gay guys can play star wars

What did the guy exclaim after inventing the shovel?

It is ground breaking!

When the chair was invented, the inventor’s friend wanted to know what it did. The inventor replied: ‘You might want to sit down for this.’

Did you here about the person who invented the door knocker?

He won a no-bell prize.

The shovel is a Ground Breaking invention. Slaps and laugh

How did Stephen Hawkins make it up the stair way to heaven? Well he didn’t they invented an elevator

I heard the man who invented Autocorrect died; may he wrist in peach.

Who invented carbonated water?

The Germans, nobody else would think of adding gas!

The shovel was a groundbreaking invention.

Who invented fractions? – Henry the 1/8.

Did you know that the shovel was a ground breaking invention?

today I invented a new word plagiarism

Did you hear about the guy who invented the first knock knock joke? He won the No Bell Prize!

A new burger has been invented in memory of Stephen Hawking.

I doubt it will sell though, as it’s 95% cabbage.

Why is the wheel the best invention?

Becuase it’s wheely wheely great!

what country did indians invent? curry-a

the invention of the shovel was groundbreaking.

Which one of Lord Arthur’s knights invented the round table.

Sir Cumference

Have you heard of the invention of the shovel? It’s groundbreaking!

I invented a new word today. Plagiarism.

How was the copper wire invented?

Two Jews were fighting over a penny.

Do you know who invented Paper?

Cai Lun!

“RIP” Cai Lun…

A child ask his father “ how do you get pink eye?” Son I was told it’s from scratching your butt, then rubbing your eyes. Then the son asks “How did I get Fungi?” As the father was about to answer. The boy says “Ohh, so is it from scratching my stinky feet, then rubbing my eye?” ———-Fungeye