Invention jokes
When the chair was invented, the inventor's friend wanted to know what it did. The inventor replied: "You might want to sit down for this."
What did the guy exclaim after inventing the shovel?
It is ground breaking!
The shovel is a ground breaking invention.
*Slaps and laughs*
How was Jenga invented?
By watching the Twin Towers collapse.
Why did God invent yeast infections? So women would know what it's like to live with an irritating cunt too.
Fine I'll soon turn this wasteland of a page into r/Admech and r/AdeptusMechanicus habitable sites by myself
You just might be why the middle finger was invented in the first place.
Why was baptism invented?
How else was a priest supposed to clean his sex toys?
Whoever invented the knock-knock joke should get a "no bell" prize.
Hey, pass me that crowbar, please.
Sure... y’know, before the crowbar was invented, crows had to drink at home.
BLESSEDBRIAN is the reason they invented the mute button.
Long time since I made a joke, huh? I used a Time Machine to make this one.
Who discovered shrimp were edible?
Probably the same one who invented the blowjob.
"You must be why they invented the word ugly."
We have invented the spade! This is groundbreaking!
Why did the T-Rex cross the road?
The chicken wasn’t invented then.
1. If being ugly was a crime, you would have a life sentence.
2. My phone battery lasts longer than your friendships.
3. There is a tree out there giving you oxygen, and you owe that tree an apology.
4. I don’t hate you, but I gotta unplug your life support to charge my phone.
5. When I saw your dad on the sidewalk, I didn’t laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.
6. If I had powers, I would make you the dumbest person alive, but it seems life already beat me to the punch.
7. If karma ever comes to punch ya in the face, I wanna be there to help it.
8. If I had a dollar for every time you said something smart, I’d be broke.
9. You are more disappointing than a cake without frosting.
10. Were you born on a highway, 'cause that’s where most accidents happen?
11. Wow, that hurts, now I know how it felt when your mom said that to ya.
12. You're the reason this country has to put directions on shampoo, and you may as well be the reason why the middle finger was invented.
"We've invented the spade!"
"Oh wow, this is ground-breaking!"
Velcro, what a rip-off!
I invented a new word today.
Plagiarism.
What was Stephen Hawking's least favorite invention? The walkie-talkie.