Santa jokes
Why is Santa so fat?
He only comes once a year.
It is September. What's the difference between a stage four colon cancer patient and Santa Claus? Santa is coming for Christmas!
My dad told me Santa was black, so instead of cookies and milk waiting for him when he came down the chimney, he got cornbread and purple Kool-Aid.
Christmas special
Me: Can you describe Mrs. Claus in 3 words? Santa: Ho ho ho.
What nationality is Santa Claus?
North Polish.
Why can't orphans celebrate Christmas?
Father Christmas left them.
Mother: "Sweetie, make a Christmas wish."
Girl: "I wish that Santa will send some clothes to those naked girls in papa's computer."
"You gotta bleed before you teeth."
- Santa Claus
What's the difference between a Christian and a child who believes Santa exists?
Nothing. They both believe in fairytales!
Joe Momma so fat when Santa came down the chimney he said, "Ho, ho, holy crap!"
Yo mama so fat, when Santa Claus went down the chimney, he said, "Ho, ho, hooooly sh*t!"
Where do short people disappear on the first of December?
Santa's Workshop.
When I was a kid, my father would tell me that the black Santa Claus was coming to our house for Christmas. So, instead of putting out cookies and milk, we would put out cornbread and purple Kool-Aid.
Why doesn't Santa have kids? Because he only comes once a year.
Why is Santa's sack so big? Because he only comes once a year.
Santa said my mom was good... But she is on the naughty list.
Why does Santa not have any children?
He only cums once a year.
Yo mama is so ugly that when Santa came to the house and saw a picture of her, he died.
What’s the difference between Santa and my dad?
Santa got the milk.
You know why Santa's saying is "Ho Ho Ho?"
How else is he supposed to give boys and girls a baby brother or sister for Christmas?