Back
Santa

Santa jokes

Coal

To spite Santa and Greta Thunberg, I'm burning the coal I got for Christmas.

Year

A 10 year old girl lays in her bed and excitedly waits for Santa to come. When Santa eventually comes she giggles, shivers, and orgasms.

Finally, as a special thank you, she sucks off Santa’s wet cock.

Sex

A father asked his son, Little Johnny, if he knew about the birds and the bees. “I don’t want to know!” Little Johnny said, exploding and bursting into tears.

Confused, his father asked Little Johnny what was wrong. “Oh, Pop,” Johnny sobbed, “For me there was no Santa Claus at age six, no Easter Bunny at seven, and no Tooth Fairy at eight. And if you’re telling me now that grownups don’t really have sex, I’ve got nothing left to live for!”

Memes

Santa memes

Dad

My dad told me Santa was black, so instead of cookies and milk waiting for him when he came down the chimney, he got cornbread and purple Kool-Aid.

Mom

Three Things I Want For Christmas From Santa:

1. A Lambo

2. A House

3. UR MOM

Sack

Santa's sack is big because he only comes once a year, but his sack is SO BIG after containing the lovely eggnog he has that those weigh the sleigh.

He never had kids because he comes in the chimney.

Dad

What’s the difference between Santa and my dad?

Santa got the milk.

Sack

What's Michael Jackson got in common with Santa?

They both empty their sacks around children.

Fat

Joe Momma so fat when Santa came down the chimney he said, "Ho, ho, holy crap!"

Boy

Santa gives a boy a bike and a soccer ball for Christmas. This upsets the boy. Why?

Answer: He has no legs. The boy has no legs.

  • 1

    • Grinch

    If the Grinch was an average white thotty b.... girl: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V6LmcrJq6oo

    If the Grinch was an average black girl: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WYzLo8vjSqI&has_verified=1

    Santa Claus

    Santa Claus gave a child a bike and a football. The child wasn’t happy. Why?

    He had no legs.