Santa jokes
Santa Claus walks up to three little girls and says, "Ho, ho, ho!"
Why don't Asian kids believe in Santa Claus?
Because they're the ones who made the toys.
Your forehead is so big, you can fit Santa’s sack on it.
It's that time is year again!
Little Johnny walked to his parents' room. They were having sex, and Little Johnny didn’t know what that was, so he said, "What are y’all doing?"
The parents replied, "Umm, r-rapping presents!"
Little Johnny said, "Okay," and then left. In the morning, Little Johnny opened his presents. His parents said, "This one is from Santa!"
Little Johnny said, "No, it’s not, y’all said y’all were rapping the presents."
The parents said, "Ohh fuck!"
Little Johnny replied, "What, Mommy and Daddy?" They replied, "Oh, nothing!" "Oh, okay," Little Johnny said. The mom whispered in the dad's ear, "At least he doesn’t know the truth."
Little Johnny said, "What truth?"
You know the song "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus"? Apparently, Santa's the mailman.
Santa and Bill Cosby's favorite quote: "Don't be dumb, make sure they're numb, and always use a condom!"
What are the differences between Santa and Joe Biden?
The kids actually want to sit on Santa’s lap.
Q: Why didn’t Santa eat the milk and cookies you set out for him?
A: He doesn’t exist, you childish sh**!
What shoes do pedophiles wear? White vans.
How do pedophiles fit in? They force it to go in.
How do you make a 16 mm hole into a 40 mm hole? A pedophile comes in.
What did Santa say when he was passing over some hookers? "Ho ho ho!"
