What's an orphan's favorite movie?
"Home Alone."
if an emo doesn't get better by Christmas Santas reindeer won't be the only thing jumping off roofs this year
What's a depressed kids favorite holiday.... Christmas because everything is hanging
Santa was asked to describe Mrs. Claus in three words. His response was, "Ho ho ho."
Snow everywhere, it's Christmas time. A person looks at the tree. The person: Only last thing left to hang! He grabs a noose.
Why is Santa always so happy? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.
what did the woman with no hands get for christmas? no idea. she hasn’t opened her present yet.
A German went to France for a holiday and here is the scene. French border staff asked, "Occupation?" The German replied, "No, no, no, just visiting."
You wanna know what i want for Christmas? My dad to come back with the milk he said he was gonna get.
Why is Santa's sack so big?
He only comes once a year
What did the kid with no arms get for Christmas? A pair of gloves! Nah, I’m not that mean, he’s still trying to open his presents.
What is a pedophile's favorite part about Halloween?
Free delivery.
Its the season of giving, So ill be giving up!
What's the similarity between a Christmas ornament and a person?
They both hang...
What movie does an orphan want for Christmas? "Spiderman: Homecoming" ;)
So a girl goes to Santa in the mall, and Santa asks what she would like for Christmas. So the kid says: “a little sister”. So then Santa says: “bring me your mother!”
Tomorrow is Christmas and I'm giving myself a present that I can't wait to open. It's my wrist. (yes this was inspired by a Fallout boy song)
What are the differences between Santa and Joe Biden. The kids actually want to sit on Santa’s lap
If I'm still single by Christmas, Santa won't be the only one jumping of a roof
When Santa Asks You what you want for Christmas then says ho ho ho say yes Please.
