You wanna know what i want for Christmas? My dad to come back with the milk he said he was gonna get.

why did sally fall off the swing? because she had no arms ~ knock knock who’s there? not sally ~ what first went through sally’s head when the nazis came? a bullet ~ where did sally go when the bomb exploded? everywhere ~ what did sally get for christmas? a bike

Why did little sally fall of the swings? Because she had no arms What did sally get for Christmas? Gloves! Only joking…she still hasn’t opened the box

What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common? - Their balls are just for decoration.

I love telling stories as theatrical plays. When we had a free dress day near Christmas my teacher dressed up as a reindeer, so I got my teacher involved…and shot her.

What nationality is Santa Claus? - North Polish.

What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves… just kidding he hasn’t opened it yet

I bought my son a fridge for Christmas. – I can’t wait to see his face light up when he opens it.

Why did Billy not like the soccer ball he got for Christmas?..

He has no legs…

What did the girl get for Christmas?

Cancer

Yo mama so stupid, I told her Christmas was right around the corner – and she looked.

When Santa Asks You what you want for Christmas then says ho ho ho say yes Please.

Guess what I got from my uncle this Christmas. -herpes

Why is Santa’s sack so big?

He only comes once a year

Why is Santa sack so big?

Because he comes once a year

I was trying to poison santa, but he killed my dad and ate all the cookies! 😤

sally has no arms. what did she get for Christmas? idk she hasn’t opened it yet.

Christmas special

Me:can you describe mrs Claus in 3 words Santa: ho ho ho

Ho Ho Ho, what do you want for Christmas little boy. Longer than 2 months to live.

Kid starts shooting people in school, teacher asks “why are you doing that”. He responds, “I wanted to paint the walls red for Christmas”