Ugliness

Ugliness Jokes

Doctor

My doctor called me fat. I told him I wanted a second opinion and he said, "OK, you're ugly too."

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  • Girlfriend

    Girlfriend: Am I pretty or ugly?

    Boyfriend: You're both!

    Girlfriend: What do you mean by that?

    Boyfriend: You're pretty ugly!!!

    Mama

    Yo mama is so ugly, when she goes to the photographer, he shoots himself.

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  • Mamma

    Your mamma's so ugly, even the toaster wouldn't get in the bathtub with her.

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  • Morbid jokes

    What's the difference between the Twin Towers and an ugly girl? The Twin Towers at least got fucked.

    Yo mama

    Yo mama is so ugly, she walked into a haunted house and walked out with a job application.

    Money

    Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.

    Wish

    30 people died in a car wreck before they got to Heaven. God asked for one wish because they died in a tragic way. The first lady, she was obsessed with her looks, so she asked to be beautiful and God granted her wish. The next person didn't know what to wish for, so they wished for the same thing. The guy in the very back was laughing, having a grand old time. Then God got to the person before the last. He said the same, he wished to be beautiful. When God got to the last person, he said, "I want them all to be ugly again."

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  • Rape

    Rape is such an ugly word, I prefer the term "struggle snuggle."

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  • Skeleton

    A funny joke scenario.

    Person 1: Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?

    Person 2: Because he had no "body" to go with.

    Person 1: Because he was ugly, fat, and nobody liked him.

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  • Roast

    Friend: "You are so ugly." Me: "You can't be talking, you give Freddy Krueger nightmares."

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  • World

    You're so ugly the whole world faked a virus just so you could wear a mask.

    Mom

    Your mom is so ugly that when she went to rob a bank, they had to turn the cameras off.

    Marriage

    Dad: Son, who do you want to marry when you grow up?

    Son: A ugly girl.

    Dad: Why not a pretty girl?

    Son: A pretty one might run away.

    Dad: So an ugly one might too.

    Son: Yeah, but who cares?

    Girl

    My friends and I were talking about this really ugly girl at our school. For some reason, she had the same name as me.

    Truth

    You want to know what the ugly truth looks like?

    Go look in the mirror.

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