Ugliness Jokes

My doctor called me fat. I told him I wanted a second opinion and he said, "OK, you're ugly too."

Girlfriend: Am I pretty or ugly?

Boyfriend: You're both!

Girlfriend: What do you mean by that?

Boyfriend: You're pretty ugly!!!

Yo mama is so ugly, when she goes to the photographer, he shoots himself.

Your mamma's so ugly, even the toaster wouldn't get in the bathtub with her.

What's the difference between the Twin Towers and an ugly girl? The Twin Towers at least got fucked.

Yo mama is so ugly, she walked into a haunted house and walked out with a job application.

Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.

30 people died in a car wreck before they got to Heaven. God asked for one wish because they died in a tragic way. The first lady, she was obsessed with her looks, so she asked to be beautiful and God granted her wish. The next person didn't know what to wish for, so they wished for the same thing. The guy in the very back was laughing, having a grand old time. Then God got to the person before the last. He said the same, he wished to be beautiful. When God got to the last person, he said, "I want them all to be ugly again."

Rape is such an ugly word, I prefer the term "struggle snuggle."

A funny joke scenario.

Person 1: Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?

Person 2: Because he had no "body" to go with.

Person 1: Because he was ugly, fat, and nobody liked him.

Friend: "You are so ugly." Me: "You can't be talking, you give Freddy Krueger nightmares."

You're so ugly the whole world faked a virus just so you could wear a mask.

Yo mama is so ugly she's the reason why Batman fights crime at night.

Your mom is so ugly that when she went to rob a bank, they had to turn the cameras off.

Dad: Son, who do you want to marry when you grow up?

Son: A ugly girl.

Dad: Why not a pretty girl?

Son: A pretty one might run away.

Dad: So an ugly one might too.

Son: Yeah, but who cares?

My friends and I were talking about this really ugly girl at our school. For some reason, she had the same name as me.

You want to know what the ugly truth looks like?

Go look in the mirror.

Yo mama is so ugly, her portraits hang themselves.

If being ugly was a crime, you would get a life sentence.

Yo mama so ugly people dress up as her at Halloween.