I invented a new word today.
Plagiarism.
If you watch "Jaws" backward, it will be a heartwarming story about a shark who gives arms and legs to disabled people.
Why is 6 afraid of 7?
It’s not. Numbers aren’t sentient and are therefore incapable of feeling fear.
What is the similarity between a joke and food?
Some people just don't get them!
They say string theory is hanging on by a thread.
Why did the boy throw the clock out the window?
He wanted to see time fly.
What's the difference between dark humor and morbid humor? Dark humor would be 10 babies in one trashcan. Morbid humor would be one baby in ten trashcans.
James: I have a joke. Sex!
Ronny: I don't get it.
James: Exactly.
What’s the best part about fucking suicide girls?
The pussies are limited edition.
My favorite joke: My life.
What is boring? Talking about boring things.
Sex dolls are alive in the Toy Story universe.
How many times can you subtract 10 from 100?
Once. The next time you would be subtracting 10 from 90.
Wanna hear two short jokes and one long one?
joke, joke, jooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooke.
Why is Death the world's biggest slut?
Death gets to f*** everyone.
Funny.
Time waits for no man, time is obviously a woman.
What is the same between water and dark jokes?
Not everyone gets it!
What is the difference between an orphan and a candle?
One is used.
I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast any time," so I ordered French toast during the Renaissance.
— Steven Wright
