Risk Jokes

If her age is on the timer, I don't care if she's a minor.

"Trust falling" with a bridge is more trustworthy than me.

Little Johnny went to the beach, found some cocaine, and died. The end.

The toaster, otherwise the perfect bath bomb.

Why did the rock not risk going to the other side of the road?

It's a damn rock, mate. It's not gonna walk!

The image shows a four-panel cartoon. In the first panel, a male character with a beard and a red hat says, "Wanda, I wish I had spider-man powers." The second panel shows Wanda, a fairy character with pink hair, looking distressed and saying, "Noooooo, Timmy, that's dangerous, you could put at risks all of humanity." In the third panel, the same male character with a beard and a red hat says, "Cosmo, I wish to change the mass of the proton." The fourth panel shows Cosmo, a fairy character with green hair, smiling and saying, "LOL, Great idea, Timmy, let's see what happens."

Why did the orphan become famous? Because they said, "Go big or go home!"

Weirdo: I'm too high to die!

Me: You'll just fall harder.

I just gotta come out and say it: I like miners, and I don’t care what y’all think. I mean the fact that they are risking their lives just to make ours a little easier is amazing. I’ve always wanted to marry one, to be honest. Y’all need to give more respect to the mining ⛏ community.

I'm never going bungee jumping because a cord bridged me into the world. It's not taking me out.

I want to make another joke about Josef Vasicek, but I think if I make the NHL, I'll die in an airplane crash, so I won't risk it again.

Why did the skydiver's parachute fail?

Because it was made by the same company that made their life decisions.

Why did the skydiver's parachute fail?

Because it realized it had a better chance of survival without them.

Why is bungee jumping similar to a condom?

Because if the rubber snaps, you're fucked.

I made an AR that shoots boo boo bullets. It does poison time 10x damage. You have a very good chance of getting STD. Very good AR. Going for 100,000. Email: EatandDrinkbouls@gmail.com

If you give a prostitute money, you will go to jail, but if you give a prostitute a Klondike bar, you will not go to jail. I would rather go to the casino and get more money for my buck.

What is the most expensive type of sex you will ever enjoy in your life? The type which will shorten your life by 5 to 10 years.

Don’t have sex. Because you will get pregnant. And die.

When you’re in India and you start hearing a tick, tick, tick, tick, you run!

I have fun going on them roller coasters that go really high up and sitting by random people, and once we get to the high point, I look at the stranger and go "wham" and unplug their seat belt.