I made a song about a tortilla. Well, it's more of a wrap.
Royal
What is faster hot or cold? Hot because you can catch a cold
A man in Saudi Arabia was caught stealing hand sanitiser. The silver lining for him is that he will not need hand sanitiser anymore
A woman was 3 months pregnant when she fell into a coma. After 6 months she woke. She asked the doctor "hows the baby?" "You had twins" the doctor replied. "Your brother named them" the woman said *oh no not my brother what did he call them?" "He called the girl Denise" "what about the boy" the woman asked the doctor said "denephew"
Random guy: hi how old are you? Me:15 The guy: you're so young, age is just a number Me: do you know what else is a number? The guy: what? Me:911
Donald trump will return to Twitter
Who can relate? NOT A RICK ROLL https://youtube.com/shorts/nnEQ5aWyO9U?feature=share
I would tell a Paul walker joke but it would crash and burn
Captain America is a 106 yo virgin
https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3Di41jwAEiOeg&ved=2ahUKEwiZlfO-kKb3AhVKY8AKHdZwAzwQwqsBegQICBAE&usg=AOvVaw3vcA7ktKJtTR0kIcyhNdRz
Breaking news (2020): depressed pigeon misses shitting on people
You will never be as lazy as whoever named the fireplace
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
Did you hear about the blind prostitute? Well, you got to hand it to her.
A guy in a white helmet telling kids to kill themselves
You're more likely to be killed by a cow than by a shark
Ricardo Medina, one of the former red Power Rangers, pleaded guilty to killing his roommate with a sword.
If finding Nemo was scientifically correct, marlin would have changed into a female and mated with Nemo
I bet my friend $5 that he would drown in the lake ... It was a bittersweet victory
What do you call a blonde in the freezer? Her parents named her Jessica, so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.