A man in Saudi Arabia was caught stealing hand sanitiser. The silver lining for him is that he will not need hand sanitiser anymore
A woman was 3 months pregnant when she fell into a coma. After 6 months she woke. She asked the doctor “hows the baby?” “You had twins” the doctor replied. “Your brother named them” the woman said *oh no not my brother what did he call them?" “He called the girl Denise” “what about the boy” the woman asked the doctor said “denephew”
Random guy: hi how old are you? Me:15 The guy: you’re so young, age is just a number Me: do you know what else is a number? The guy: what? Me:911
Ricardo Medina, one of the former red Power Rangers, pleaded guilty to killing his roommate with a sword.
If finding Nemo was scientifically correct, marlin would have changed into a female and mated with Nemo
What do you call a blonde in the freezer? Her parents named her Jessica, so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.