Risk jokes
What's worse than 10 babies in a truck?
One baby in 10 trucks.
My parents were concerned when I said I like to bleed, but at least I cut my risk of cancer and stroke in half.
Children who are unvaccinated are less likely to have autism. You know why?
-You have to be alive to have autism.
What do cigarettes and hamsters have in common? They can both be dangerous when you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.
A man got in a bad car accident. He was at risk of losing his arm. The doctors had to perform complicated surgery on his arm. The man's wife visited after the surgery. The doctor came up to her and said:
"I have good news and bad news."
The wife said: "What's the good news?"
"We managed to save his arm."
"What's the bad news?"
"We couldn't save the rest of him."
Are you a toaster?
'Cause I wanna take a bath with you.
A condom and bungee jumping are exactly alike, if the rubber breaks, you're f**ked.
A man walks into a pharmacy and buys multiple containers of Tylenol, and the clerk asks why he's buying all of these. He replies with, "I'm playing 1 pill eat 100."
Gather 6 friends to play Russian roulette, and one's mind will be blown away.
How do you help a suicidal person cheer up?
You tell them it's a leap of faith.
What's the difference between a prostitute and a daredevil? One has cunning stunts, whilst the other has a stunning...
I tried to warn my son about playing Russian roulette. It went in one ear and out the other.
Fuck it, suicide is wrong, but if you jump off a bridge and yell "parkour," it's a failed stunt.
Why are cops worried about drunk drivers and not elderly drivers?
Why do risky people have cats?
So they have 10 lives with them.
When you’re in India and you start hearing a tick, tick, tick, tick, you run!
Some people say I like heights; others say I'm a daredevil.
In reality, I like killing myself.
A guy stuffed some cigarettes up his eyes thinking it would make him see colors.
The next day, he could see only one color... black.
You want to know the bad thing? Only 5 out of 6 people like Russian roulette.
Little Johnny went to the beach, found some cocaine, and died. The end.