Security Jokes

What do you call a night guard at the glory hole inside a adult bookstore? guardian of the confessional booth

what do you do when you get locked outside your house...... you talk to the lock. because communication is key.

When me and my friend went to the market, my friend tried to scan my arm and I asked her what she was doing and she answered "Oh I had to buy you so I don't steal you"

So I didn't want my mom going through my laptop so I put a touch screen on it where you just have to tap the screen to unlock it jokes on her she doesn't have any fingers.

So I got asked why I suddenly started wearing a beret and I said, well you never know when you need to pick a lock

If you own a gun and you live in the USA, hide your gun upstairs Biden can't get it.

Biden: *falls over on steps*


Daughter: I know this is weird but I feel like that someone is watching me when I am sleeping.

Father: Sorry