Go jokes

A lesbian couple and a gay couple are going to San Francisco. Who made it first?

The lesbian couple got there lickety-split.

The gay couple was still packing their shit.

My grandma always looks at me when we go to a wedding and says, "You’re next!"

When we attend a funeral, I say, "You’re next!"

I don’t know why I go to the gym. Being healthy is dying as fast as possible, and I really want to speed that shit up.

What does Can do after eating its vegetables?

Go on eBay to see how much he can sell the wheelchair for.

Why did the emo kids stop going to their favorite tree?

It died before them.

The tortoise can't go out to play, Or sell his house or rent it. For when he moves, his house moves too, And nothing can prevent it.

Katy Perry can't sing, can't dance, doesn't write music, is unbelievably ugly, and is unable to decipher maths or science. Really though, I didn't realize going down on a record executive would later lead her to be one of the people able to go to space.

A gay couple and a lesbian couple are going on a cruise. Who gets there first?

Obviously, the lesbian couple; they got their lickety-split. The gay couple was still packing their shit.

Sometimes, you've got to specifically go out of your way to get into trouble. It's called fun.

There's a new Viagra and prune juice diet that's out.

Unfortunately, you can't tell if you're coming or going.

Your hairline go so far back it remember the Civil War, ugly ahh.

Why did Catholic women stop going to church?

Because it takes Jesus three days to rise.

My grandad and your hairline go way back.

My son wore his new "Go Vegan" Hoodie for the first time today, and already he's been verbally abused as well as being punched, kicked, & spat on!!!!

And he's not even left the house yet!!!

Where did Sora go during Nagasaki?

Everywhere.

POV: You go to Asian prison.

You get served extra rice.

My Mrs is going to hit the roof when she realizes I've replaced the bed with a trampoline!

Orphan: I'm hungry.

Dad: Let's go to KFC.

Orphan 2: Boy, you don't got a dad!

I heard the Kardashians were going on a cruise soon.

As if there's not already enough plastic in the ocean.

Mom, where are we going?

To your grandma's funeral.

Yeah, 'cause I 360 no-scoped that b*tch in the face.