Ride

Ride jokes

Boy

    • A boy walks in on his mother riding his father. "What are you doing?" the boy asks his mother. "I'm jumping on daddy to make him thin," said the mother. "Don't bother," said the boy, "when you go shopping, the lady next door comes and blows him up again."

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    • Woman

    • What is the difference between a flat tire bicycle and a woman?

    Answer: You need to pump the tire on the bicycle before you ride it, while a woman you need to ride her and pump.

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    • Ride memes

    Angel

    • Three women were in heaven. The angel at the gates said, "How good the ride into heaven is for you, is determined by your commitment to your most recent partner."

    The first lady says, "2 years, 2 side-hoes." She got an old lexus.

    The second lady says, "10 years, 1 visit from a prostitute." She got a Mercedes-Benz.

    The third lady says, "I never had a husband."

    The angel says in response, "F*ck me and then you can have a lambo."

    They all arrive in heaven, to see the second lady crying.

    The first lady says, "I know we are dead, but it could be a lot worse."

    "How!?" The third lady cries, "The angel has a flute for a d*ck!"

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    • Micheal Jackson

    • Michael Jackson and Tonya Harding got together back in the day for a horse racing venture. Tonya says, "I'll handle the handicapping, you go ride the 3-year-olds."

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    • Child

    • As a child, my mother always told me she was going horse riding. My whole life changed when I found out she was under the horse.

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    • Cow

    • A lady from the city and her traveling companion were riding the train through Vermont when she noticed some cows. "What a cute bunch of cows!" she remarked.

    "Not a bunch, a herd," her friend replied.

    "Heard of what?"

    "Herd of cows."

    "Of course I've heard of cows."

    "No, a cow herd."

    "What do I care what a cow heard? I have no secrets to keep from a cow!"

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