Dad jokes

What do you call a cow without any legs?

Ground beef!

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhahahaa

Yo mama so fat, it took your dad eight years to come back with the milk.

I saw an orphan on the street. I said, "Where are your parents?" He cried and said, "My mum and dad died in a car crash!" 😆😆😂😂🤣

My Dad: Son, history always repeats itself.

Me: So you're gonna leave me again?

Your dad? Oh wait, you don’t have that!

Why do orphans not like jokes?

Because they hate your "mom" and "dad" joke because they miss their parents. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Why do orphans only drink water in cereal?

'Cause Dad never brought home the milk...

Teacher: What is your least favorite holiday?

Orphan: National Forgive Your Mom And Dad Day.

Teacher: Why is that your least favorite?

Orphan: Because I don't have any parents to forgive.

Teacher: *tries to hold back* HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

A dad is in a wheelchair and his daughter goes, "Don't step on a crack!"

I went to ask my friend's mom if I could have a sleepover.

Then I remembered they did not have a mom or dad.

I tried kidnapping a kid today and told him I was his dad's friend and I would take him home. He just curled up into a ball and started crying. Kidnapping must be easy.

Why are orphans bad at dad jokes?

Because they don't have a dad to tell them.

I walk in on my mum and she's in the middle of pulling off my dad's boxers. I said, "Mum, you really spoil those dogs!"

Why can't orphans play soccer? Because they can't practice with their dad.

Ask an orphan this: "What's the difference between cancer and your dad? Cancer comes back!"

I wasn’t close to my dad when he died. It’s a good thing he stepped on a land mine.

My dad walked in on me having sex with a dog. She gasped and shouted at me, "Get out of here, it's my turn!"

Son: Dad, I need a new butt.

Dad: Why, son?

Son: Because mine has a huge crack in it.

What do you call a girl with one leg? Ilean.

So one day a boy was at his dad's work when another little boy ran in crying. Then the dad said, "Aw, little boy, are you lost? Where's your parents?" And the little boy at his dad's work said, "OMG! Dad, you can't say that!"

Why can't he say that?

Answer: He works at an orphanage.