Wife: “I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?” Husband: “You have perfect eyesight.”
Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last as long for fat people.
Tell a woman she’s beautiful a hundred times and she won’t believe you. Tell a woman she’s fat once and she will remember it for the rest of her life because elephants never forget.
Teacher:Kids what does a chicken give you
Teacher: Very good now what does the pig give you
Teacher: Excellent now what does the fat cow give you
Why do the japanese hate Christmas???
Becasue the last time a Fat Man came down the chimney, they lost half their population
What do you call a fat psychic?
A four chin teller.
Fatty and skinny were in a bed. Fatty rolled over and skinny was dead.
Me:if the skinny person goes skinny dipping then what do fat people do?
my friend: Chunky dunks
Losing weight is a piece of cake. Just don’t pick it up.
My doctor told me that I had to burn calories, so I took a fat kid and lit them on fire
My doctor called me fat. I told him I wanted a second opinion and he said, “OK, you’re ugly too.”
Yo mama is so fat it took Nation Wide 15 years to get on her side.
A woman noticed her husband standing on a bathroom scale, sucking in his stomach. “Ha! Thats not going to help!” She said. “Sure it does.” he said. “Its the only way i can see the numbers.”
Yo Mama so fat when she stepped on the scale it said-- To be continued
Yo mama so fat, when she walked by the TV, I missed three episodes.
yo mama so fat thanos had to clap
yo mamas so fat that she doesn’t need internet cause she is already world wide
YOUR MAMA SO FAT WHEN SHE ASKED FOR A WATER BED THEY PUT A BLAKET OVER THE PACIFIC OCEAN
I know five fat people and you’re three of them
Yo mama so fat she sat on an iPhone and turned it into an iPad.