Wife: “I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?” Husband: “You have perfect eyesight.”

My doctor called me fat. I told him I wanted a second opinion and he said, “OK, you’re ugly too.”

What do you call a fat psychic?

A four chin teller.

Tell a woman she’s beautiful a hundred times and she won’t believe you. Tell a woman she’s fat once and she will remember it for the rest of her life because elephants never forget.

Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last as long for fat people.

Yo mama so fat she sat on an iPhone and turned it into an iPad.

your mamas so fat, scientists found a new planet called Heranus

When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat children into the fire.

What do you call a fat chinese man

A double chinkey

Yo mama so fat, even Bob the Builder said, “We can’t fix that!”

Yo mama is so fat, she goes to the beach to sell shade.

Yo mama so FAT, she can’t handle files bigger than 4 GB.

Yo mama so fat, when she walked by the TV, I missed three episodes.

Yo mama so fat that when she sits down, the earth falls out of the Solar System.

Yo mama so fat, she takes her selfies in panoramic mode.

Yo mama so fat when she goes to the movies, she sits next to everyone.

Yo mama so fat, she has her own event horizon.

Yo Mama so fat when she stepped on the scale it said-- To be continued

Yo mama is so fat, she sat on a quarter and popped a booger out of George Washington’s nose.

What do you call a fat midget

  • A pig
Worst Jokes Ever uses cookies.