Fatherhood jokes
Why does the orphan go to church? He needs someone to call father.
Why do orphans like Darth Vader?
So he can say, "I'm your father!"
Dad joke.
Why does a dad get more than a pair of socks at the golf course?
Because of a hole in one!
Q: What movie do orphans hate?
A: Fatherhood.
Son: Dad, where are you?
Dad: Getting another one.
Son: Getting what?
Dad: Dad.
My girlfriend really wants me to get her pregnant so she would have a father figure in her life for once.
TV Darth Vader: "I'm your father!"
Orphans: "Yea."
A lot of things changed when I got my girlfriend pregnant: my name, my address, and my phone number.
Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?
In case they get a hole in one!
What starts with "M" and ends in "arrige" and is a man's favorite thing?
Miscarriage, this joke never gets old, just like the baby.
Why do orphans love to go to church? Because they have someone to call father.
Why doesn't Santa have kids? Because he only comes once a year.
Why don’t orphans have sex?
Because they have no one to call “daddy.”
My dad is so good at hiding, even the FBI can't find him.
I worry about him sometimes.
Why does an orphan like church so much? So he can call someone "father."
Why was Kobe a good father?
He took his daughter with him.
Why does an orphan never learn how to drive? Because he has no dad to help him.
Imagine Michael Jackson having kids? Would they come out Black or white or plastic?
At school, Little Johnny's classmate tells him that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, so it's very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth."
Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. Johnny's mother greets him at home, and he tells her, "I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, "Just don't tell your father."
Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." The father promptly hands him $40 and says, "Please don't say a word to your mother."
Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, "I know the whole truth." The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, "Then come give your Daddy a great big hug!"
Son: “Dad, did you get the results of the DNA test back?”
Dad: “Call me George.”