I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. – A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
I went for a job interview today and the manager said, “We’re looking for someone who is responsible.”
“Well, I’m your man.” I replied, “In my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I was responsible.”
Confucius say, man who runs behind car will get exhausted, but man who runs in front of car will get tired.
I had to clean out my spice rack and found everything was too old and had to be thrown out. – What a waste of thyme.
Two windmills are standing in a field and one asks the other, “What kind of music do you like?” – The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”