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What’s a similarity between your best friend and a tree? They both fall over when you hit them with an axe.

What do emos and apples have in common?

They both hang on trees.

How do you get an emo out of a tree?

Cut the rope.

How do trees get online? – They just log in.

A computer science student is studying under a tree and another pulls up on a flashy new bike. The first student asks, “Where’d you get that?”

The student on the bike replies, “While I was studying outside, a beautiful girl pulled up on her bike. She took off all her clothes and said, “You can have anything you want.””

The first student responds, “Good choice! Her clothes probably wouldn’t have fit you.”

How do you get an emo out of a tree? You cut the rope.

Can I branch out to some tree puns. Willow you allow me it’s only fur. No? Oakome on

What’s a skeleton’s favorite plant? A BONE-zai tree. But if they don’t like that one, how about a S-pine tree?

How do you get a one armed man out of a tree?

You wave at him.

Trees are so social. They’re always branching out.

Chuck Norris can pick an apple from an orange tree and make the best lemonade you’ve ever tasted.

What’s a teacher favorite tree

A geometry

What do you call an orphans family tree A stump

If trees could kill you, they wood.

What’s green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? – A pool table.

How do you get a man with only one arm out of a tree?


Friends are like trees, they fall over if you hit them with an ax.

What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common? - Their balls are just for decoration.

A man crashed his new expensive car into a tree He now knew how the Mercedes bends

How do you get my neighbor out of their tree? You untie the rope.