Aed jokes
What do you do to a deaf girl after you’re done fucking her?
Break her fingers so she can’t tell anyone.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.
Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is.
I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.
What do you call an orphan’s family reunion? Me time.
Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family.
What is an orphan’s least favorite song? We Are Family.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? Meet the Parents.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music? House.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What’s an orphan’s favorite band? Foster the People.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms.
What beer do orphans drink? Foster’s.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin.
Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it’s the only love they get.
Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away? Me: Your parents.
"Yes, officer! It was a requirement to run over that child. It matched perfectly with the beat drop!"
What do you call a nosy pepper?
Jalapeno.
A Catholic gay male that is well-endowed goes to confession, and while he is inside the confessional booth, the Catholic priest is sucking his dick, and he says to the Catholic priest, "What are you doing, Father?"
And the priest says, "It's called giving a blowjob."
And the Catholic gay male says, "Why are you giving me a blowjob, Father, inside the confessional booth?"
And the Catholic priest says, "If there was no glory hole in the confessional booth, my son, it would not be called a confessional booth in the first place."
I went to my local shooting range today but was surprised when I saw on the news that there was a school shooting in my shooting range. I don't know who snitched...
Bro, if I die, I want to die blown up by 34 pounds of C4 at a furry convention.
You're so poor, when a robber robs your house, they feel bad for you and just leave.
Jordan, you stupid ass! Addison never bothered you so leave her the FUCK alone! How about this? Get up, go outside, stop being a jackass, and get a fucking life!
I watched a documentary called "Redline Carrera: Birth of the Memes." It all started with Paul Walker.
You should go back into the abortion bucket. Maybe you'll find half a brain in there.
I once dated a math teacher. It turned out she was nothing but problems.
My cousin just broke up with her boyfriend, and I told her, "Since your dad owns a moving company, you can already take half of his stuff."
Why can't Mexicans play Uno?
Because they can't get a green card.
Why did the guitar teacher get arrested?
He fingered a minor.
A Chinese drug dealer said to me, "Do you like my cocaine?"
I replied, "Not since he starred in Zulu."
Yo mama so fat they faked COVID-19 just to put a mask on her.
I was going to make a pun about math, but my answers never add up.
I'm not saying you're annoying.
But if a yeast infection were a person, it would be you.
What do a politician and a minister have in common?
Both of them will tell you anything to get money from you.