Aed jokes
One day I was with my mom and we had no money on the credit card, and we live far, and my mom was hungry.
A guy and his friend had a car and asked us if we were lost. We said no, we have no ride, no money, and my mom is hungry. So the guy would take us for a blowjob each, so I was driving the car and my mom gave both guys a blowjob. We had to get out of the car to look for something, then the two guys went in the car and told us we got bad news and good news. I asked what the bad news was. They said that they're not taking us home, so I asked what the good news was. They told me that they fed my mom and drove off. I guess where they left us wasn't a long walk and my mom wasn't hungry anymore.
Why does a giraffe need such a long neck?
Because its head is so far away from its body.
Your Momma's so fat, the recursive function calculating her mass causes a stack overflow.
Last time Kenny ate a vegetable, he got banned from his mom's nursing home.
What does it take to paint a wall red?
Kurt Cobain and his shotgun.
When a woman decides to abort, it is called a decision, but when I run my truck into a playground of kids, it is called murder.
What's the difference between a little boy and a freezer?
The freezer doesn't scream when you put your meat in it.
Why does a duck have tail feathers?
To cover his butt-quack.
I’m a clown...
And everyone knows.
What is Trump's favorite snack?
Cheetos.
(Get it? He looks like a Cheeto!)
Three Nazis walk into a bar.
What do you call a vagina with multiple clits?
A tongue workout!
Q: What is the difference between two bottles of Whiskey and 2 pretty feminist girls?
A: You don't leave the bottles in the cold and dark forest after you and your 9 friends are finished with them.
I like porn a lot. I was wondering if you guys can talk to me.
What does a bar fly and a necrophiliac have in common?
They both enjoy a cold one once in a while.
Once upon a time... Chuck Norris stepped on a Lego. R.I.P. the Lego piece.
What’s the difference between a pimple and a Priest?
You see, a pimple wouldn’t normally come on a kid until he’s 13 years old.
I love me a nice tight pussy. That's why I'm in big trouble with RSPCA.
If Trump colored his hair green and wore an orange shirt and pants, I will call him a carrot.
Yo mama is so fat, a rogue shadowstepped her and got a loading screen.