Crime jokes
NEWS: A man kidnapped a 13-year-old girl.
MOM OF GIRL: The man had a shady face and a receding hairline.
"Daveon, stop screaming for help because I broke your kneecaps!"
If a dog is white with black spots, then it is 90% great and 10% guilty because it half way starts crimes and is a mistake to the world and is punished by the white dogs that are full white and not mixed colors.
What's a pedo's favorite snack?
Sour Patch Kids.
Below I meant to say I set the gay person on fire.
Why do egos like robbing banks?
They get a cut.
What is the difference between a thief and a doctor?
The thief knows what you have!
Yo mama is so ugly that even scammers wouldn't go after her money.
I wasn't gonna tell another Epstein joke but I didn't want to leave anyone hanging.
Smoking a fag in Britain: 🚬
Smoking a fag in America: hate crime.
Vince Li doesn't eat comedians. He says they taste funny.
Q. What do you get when you cross Vince Li with a bus? A. A whole lot of people who wished they'd missed the bus that day.
The USA has school shootings. We Canadians have bus beheadings.
What do you call a Japanese car thief?
Tommy took a motor.
If a woman named Susan gets murdered, is it considered a Sue-icide?
So, one day Kylin Banks was playing football. Then he saw Violet. After he saw her, he got bricked up. Then he ran after her and rubbed his pickle all over her. She was so happy.
Man yelling at mailman realizes he's opening the mailbox.
Mailman: "There's a pipe bomb in your mailbox..."
October 1, 2017 is when the Mandalay Bay became the Mandalay spray. Thank Steve for that.
Osama Bin Laden thrown in ocean!
People who helped with the Twin Towers destruction: ...
Kid: Hey, Mum, why are we pushing the car off the cliff?
Mum: Shut up, son, you’ll wake your father!