Crime jokes

Man yelling at mailman realizes he's opening the mailbox.

Mailman: "There's a pipe bomb in your mailbox..."

October 1, 2017 is when the Mandalay Bay became the Mandalay spray. Thank Steve for that.

Git is going to let Bill Cosby out of jail. Oh wait, he watched Little Bill.

People thought they were going to another country till they saw terrorists were flying the plane.

What's a pedo's favorite snack?

Sour Patch Kids.

"Daveon, stop screaming for help because I broke your kneecaps!"

Mr. Beast challenge in Memphis be like: last one to survive the shooting wins 1 million dollars.

If the shoe doesn't fit, there's no evidence.

Did you hear that the cameraman got arrested? He shot a film.

I'm Pastor Moe Mister, Moe Lester.

A guy goes into the gas station and says, "I need a box of rubbers with pesticide."

The cashier said, "Pesticide? Don't you mean spermicide?"

The guy says, "No! My old lady has had a bug up her ass all week, and I am going to kill it."

Shout out to the terrorists, your year is starting off with a bang!

I lost my job at the bank. Some lady asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her.

Me and my friend have a friend that's in a wheelchair, but he is so annoying, so we throw him in a fire. Now we call him "Hot Wheels."

Are you a school? 'Cause I wanna shoot kids in you.

I don’t know why I’m in jail. So, basically, I was at a gun range, and we were supposed to hit the targets, even though I hit it.

Why do orphans rob the bank?

Because they want to be wanted.

What am I gonna do on the 5th anniversary of the Parkland shooting?

Shoot a load in you just like I shot those kids ;)

What's with all the orphan jokes? Kinda sus. #fbi

I’m gonna put my AR 15 up your fucking ass and pull the trigger!