Crime jokes
Mosely in a white van.
Why did Timmy throw the clock out the window?
It reminded him of Arnold Clock, the man convicted of knife raping his wife.
Dani: Hey, do you like rapists?
Tess: No!
Dani: Oh, well I'm a rapist!
Tess: Oh!
Why don't stags buy drugs? Because they are too deer.
I molested a child today, and it felt quite lovely on my penis! π
Memes
Shits about to go down
What do you call a fat man with a rape whistle? Hogan!
What's the difference between a mole and a priest?
One will till your 13 to put hairs on your face.
What do you call an Asian that steals cars? Tommy toke a motor.
Why did the terrorists crash?
They were doing the job they loved but not getting paid.
Lol.
There was a kid in a wheelchair. I put him on fire and called him Hot Wheels.
How many gangsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
35! Do you have a problem with that?
Why didn't the 6th of Jan go well? Cause the shitty Trump supporters didn't carry out the damn job correctly and let the president down. Also, hang Mike Pence!
There were two sisters. They said they were supporting nine eleven, so I shot one of the sister's kneecaps, and the other sister got shot in the head.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Bill Cosby will pudding rape you.
Me being raped is like my birth certificate; it doesn't expire.
Q: What's worse than f**king a 2 year old?
A: Wiping the blood off of your clown suit afterwards.
"Proud Boys? More like proud snitches!"
Q: Why can orphans never be criminals?
A: Because they're never wanted.
"White on white crime, well ham rights crime anyway in Eastern Europe right now!"
My willy was feeling itchy, so I decided to go to the doctor.
My doctor was foreign and spoke Spanish with an Argentinian accent. As I returned home, I noticed my willy was gone! Pessi stole my PENis thinking it was a Penalty just so he could statpad. SHAME ON YOU!