Time

Anonymous

School shooting happens

Foreign exchange student: Sobbing under desk

American student: “First time?”

School

Anonymous

An American is lecturing a British person, saying things like “it’s an elevator not a lift” and “it’s chips not crisps” etc. After a while of this the British person calmly retorted “they’re schools, not shooting ranges”.

Hospital

Anonymous

What do you do when you finish a magazine at a hospital? Reload and keep shooting

Man

Anonymous

I went to the shooting range the other day after a while I realized I was the only one there so I decided to go home and saw on the news that there was a mass school shooting and there were reporters on the scene, man I knew I should have stayed around a little longer.

School

Hue G. Rection

How are school shooting victims and school shooting jokes similar?

They never get old.

Stop

Anonymous

Covid 19 stopped mass shooting faster than the Government

Sadness

Daniel

I was at a funeral for some kids in a school shooting. I don’t understand why everyone was so sad, so I asked a lady, what’s so sad and she said “What do you think was running through these kid’s head before they died”. I replied “probably a bullet”, she gasped and said “do you have any idea how insensitive that is, what do you think is running through their parent’s heads”, I said " probably all the money their losing from this funeral".

Difference

Anonymous

what’s the difference between a shooter and a bullied autistic kid

Depends who’s shooting

Man

Dom

man asks a women: Are you a school? women: No why? man: Oh i wanted to shoot my kid inside of you.

Lost

Arctic

I lost at Kahoot so I had to ka-shoot

Friend

JayBeePlays

My friend was a victim of a school shooting once but he couldnt tell if they were in the library because of the suppressor on his ar

Cold

Anus

A Mexican bandit made a specialty of crossing the Rio Grande from time to time and robbing banks in Texas. The banks offered a reward for his capture, dead or alive, but offered a much larger award for the recovery of the stolen funds. An enterprising Texas Ranger decided to track him down. After a long and difficult search, he traced the bandit to his home town. On a hunch, he checked the town’s cantina, and sure enough, there was the robber. The only other people in the bar were the bartender and a scrawny, older man at a back table. The time was right to make a move. The ranger drew his revolver, charged into the cantina, and announced: “You are under arrest. I get a reward for you, dead or alive. Tell me where the money is, and I’ll let you live. If you don’t, I’ll shoot you right here, and save myself the trouble of having to take you back to Texas alive.” But the bandit didn’t speak English, and the Ranger didn’t speak Spanish. As it turned out, the scrawny man at the back of the bar happenedd to be a lawyer. He knew the robber, and was bilingual, and quickly offered to translate for the two of them. The ranger said: “Tell him that if he doesn’t tell me where the loot is, I’ll shoot him here and now.” Upon hearing what the Ranger had said, and seeing the cold look in his eye, the bandit knew that the Ranger meant it - if he did not give up his loot, he was a dead man. Terrified, the bandit blurted out in Spanish that the loot was buried in an old barn at the outskirts of town. “What did he say?” asked the Ranger. The lawyer answered: “He said, ‘You don’t have the nerve to shoot me, Yankee swine.’”

White

Anonymous

Why are white teenagers the best for the army? They are good at shooting things up.

Apology

Anonymous

The Somalian Olympics Team has just apologized to the Olympic Committee after realizing that sailing and shooting were two separate events.

Man

TheRiotHouse

A man tried to shoot Adolf Hitler but missed. Then Adolf replied, “Oh shoot, I did nazi that coming!”

Girl

CaptainMuffin9

Girls are like blackjack you shoot for 21 but I keep hitting 14

Wife

Anonymous

3 citizens were going through an exam to become agents of the FBI, their instructor handed the first guy a gun in a room with his wife and said he had to shoot them, he walked out in shame and said he couldn’t do it. The second guy had the same scenario, he put the gun up but couldn’t pull the trigger so he walked out in shame. The third guy was put in the same scenario, he walked out and told the instructor, “The gun wasn’t loaded, I had to strangle the bitch.”

Man

ThunderGod2245

A man shoots up a School and then fakes his own death, he then later returns to shoot up the same school, he repeats the prosses a few times untill the police catch him, when they ask why he did it, he replied “I wondered when you would check if i was still breathing”

Steal

Anonymous

why is the thief so good at basketball? because he can shoot, steal, and run

School

Anonymous

When a school shooter walks to the intercom and plays pumped up kicks

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