Shooting jokes

Want to know why parents don't get school shooting jokes?

Because they are aimed at a younger audience.

What do you do when you finish a magazine at a hospital?

Reload and keep shooting.

A man with a gun goes into a bank and demands money.

Once he is given the money, he turns to a customer and asks, "Did you see me rob this bank?"

The man replied, "Yes sir, I did."

The robber shot him in the head, killing him instantly.

He then turned to a couple standing next to him and asked the man, "Did you see me rob this bank?"

The man replied, "No sir, I didn't, but my wife did!"

How are school shooting victims and school shooting jokes similar? They never get old.

I got kicked out of the hospital for saying, "Stay Positive," to the corona patients.

Covid 19 stopped mass shootings faster than the Government.

I was at a funeral for some kids in a school shooting. I don't understand why everyone was so sad, so I asked a lady, "what's so sad?" and she said "What do you think was running through these kid's heads before they died?" I replied "probably a bullet". She gasped and said "do you have any idea how insensitive that is? What do you think is running through their parent's heads?" I said "probably all the money they're losing from this funeral."

Three citizens were going through an exam to become agents of the FBI. Their instructor handed the first guy a gun in a room with his wife and said he had to shoot her. He walked out in shame and said he couldn't do it. The second guy had the same scenario. He put the gun up, but couldn't pull the trigger, so he walked out in shame. The third guy was put in the same scenario. He walked out and told the instructor, "The gun wasn't loaded, I had to strangle the bitch."

A young blonde woman fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a shop and buys a handgun.

The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. The hysterical blonde tells her husband: "Shut up... you're next!"

*School shooting happens* Foreign exchange student: *Sobbing under desk* American student: "First time?"

An American is lecturing a British person, saying things like "it's an elevator, not a lift" and "it's chips, not crisps" etc. After a while of this, the British person calmly retorted, "they're schools, not shooting ranges."

Girls are like blackjack; you shoot for 21, but I keep hitting 14.

He turns, he shoots!

And that is a horrible end to the Grand National...

A panda walks into a bar. He asked the bartender for a sandwich and then proceeds to shoot him, then leaves the bar. Later on, after asking witnesses, the police track down the panda and take him to the station. They question him and ask, “Why’d you do it?” The panda replied, “It’s what pandas do, look it up.” So they did, they went on Wikipedia, and there it was: Pandas eat shoots and leaves.

Why the f was my shooting joke removed? It was funny, and this is obviously a website for morbid humor. WTF, I mean, worstjokesever.com. Come on...

John F. Kennedy: "Are you a bullet? Because I can't get you out of my head."

Why did the bank robber shoot the man with no arms?

Because he told the man to put his hands up.

If a person shoots a person about to commit suicide, is it making it less painful, or is it murder?

Bob Ross fighting in Vietnam. "They're in the happy little trees, shoot the happy little trees and bushes!"

The teacher told me to put my MP3 away, so I brought out my MP5. Now that bitch knows what not to tell me.