A cop pulls a guy over for suspected drunk driving. The cop opens the door and the driver falls out onto the asphalt. The cop says, "Holy shit, you're so drunk, you can't even walk!"
The drunk says, "No shit, that's why I took my car!"
Q.What gets longer if pulled, fits snugly between breasts, slides neatly into a hole, chokes people when used incorrectly, and works well when jerked?
A. A seatbelt.
Wen you run over a speed bump in a school zone and you remember that there are no speed bumps.
My brother is ugly one time he stuck his head out the window, the police arrested for mooning
How does Hellen Keller drive?
With one hand on the wheel and the other on the road.
billie: hi
me: you wanna hear a story?
billie: yes sure
me: once upon a time, i ran over your dog last night.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
If you want to see my foes, bring a shovel and bring a map and a getaway car just in case we get caught.
What's the difference between paul walker's car and a petite white girl. There is no difference They both got split open by a huge log.
Why cant Stephen hawking be a rocket league car? because he cant jump for a aerial
I've been hit by several things in my life. Sadly, never a car.
What do you call Hitler speeding?
The Fast and the Fuherous.
Why is it so hard to choose between buying a Subaru or a Volvo? Because you’re deciding whether you want to look like a rapist or a pedophile
whats the difference between a lambo and a boner
your sister didnt give me a lambo
Guy starts chatting to pretty woman at a party Seeing that she didn't back off he asked her name. "Carmen," she replied. That's a nice name," he said warming up the conversation,
"Who named you, your mother?"
"No, I named myself, she answered.
"Oh, that's interesting. Why Carmen?"
"Because I like cars, and I like men," she said looking directly into his eyes. "So what's your name?" she asked.
‘BJ Titsngolf’
What objects have the most gravitational force. A lambo and a gold digger
Asian man goes to the eye doctor. Doctor says, "It looks like you have a cataract." Asian guy says, "No Doc, I drive a Rincoln."
I can tell a joke :`)
Twinkle Twinkle there's a car Coming like a shooting star. I will stand in the way I will not be seen again Are you happy I am dead Now you made it to the end
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
What do you call a indian in a lamorgini?
CURRY in a hurry.
